Naked man flashes his wiener during Alvin and the Chipmunks screening

Written by Vince Mancini / 01.04.12

Meet Edward L. Brown. He’s a 34-year-old Chicago resident who, on December 29th, stripped naked during a screening of Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked “stood up from his seat in the front row, faced the crowd of 86 theater-goers, stretched out his hands and displayed his genitalia.” But that’s not the best part. The best part is what he did next. HE SAT DOWN TO WATCH THE REST OF THE MOVIE. “Hey, y’all, HERE’S MY DICK! …Now, let’s see how these singing chipmunks make it off this island.”

Entirely naked Edward L. Brown stood up from his seat in the front row, faced the crowd of 86 theater-goers, stretched out his hands and displayed his genitalia for all to see before sitting back down to enjoy the movie.
Two North Riverside police officers, who were patrolling inside the mall, responded to the scene within a minute, ordered Brown to put his clothes back on and, without further incident, escorted him out the fire entrance and away from those who remained inside the theater.

According to the police report, Brown told officers that he had been let inside the movie theater for free by an unknown female who allegedly told him to have a seat in the front row of the theater, take off his clothes and wait for her, so they could have sex, smoke crack and do heroin.

Read the rest of this entry »

28 Comments TAGS: , , , ,

Yo Girl, Get Funky Wit Dis Junkie

Written by Ashley Burns / 05.18.10
Yo girl, let's bounce, this party hella whack.

Yo girl, let's bounce, this party hella whack.

Yo girl, I gots bad news for you, right? I’m a heroin addict, boo. I’m junkie like a mutha, suck yo d*ck for some bomb big harry, son. Yeah, that’s right, you gots to worry ‘bout the C-Tate, cousin. I be all pukin’ up in here cuz I’m goin’ through wiffdrawal, heard. Sh*t’s gonna get real up in this bitch, like my skin is crawlin’ and I can’t dance no more cuz the demons be eatin’ my soul, chuch. Yo girl, will you be there for me and help C-Tate get his schwerve back, holler for real?

Haha, just kiddin’, you dumb beeyotch. C-Tate ain’t mess with the junk, girl. I be actin’ for my new role in What’s Left of Us, based on Richie Farrell’s word book. Yo, that ain’t the Anchorman dude, baby drawers. I ain’t like the Will Ferrell, not like my man Ashton Kutcher, yo. He’s the comedy, for realz, A-Kutch ya heard!

Share some needles wif me, Deadline:

The Dear John heartthrob and G.I. Joe action figure will star in What’s Left of Us, based on Richie Farrell’s novel, which the author is adapting for the screen. Based on a true story, Tatum will play a heroin addict going through 7 excruciating days in detox. Farrell knows the subject well: he sold the documentary High On Crack Street to HBO.

Read the rest of this entry »

24 Comments TAGS: , , , , ,

NEW IRON MAN VIDEO

Written by Vince Mancini / 04.08.08

In this new clip from Iron Man, Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.) takes his first crack at flying in the Iron Man suit. The eggheads try to convince him it’s not ready yet, but in typical Downey fashion, he blows everone off to get high (wink wink, nudge nudge, heroin heroin).

Now, I know it’s tempting to nerdgasm over this, but keep in mind this movie isn’t coming out until next month.  It’s hard to even think about that when we’ve still got a Keanu Reeves cop flick and a remake of Prom Night coming out this weekend.  I for one love remakes because they’re totally kind of like that one movie I already saw.  

(sigh) April sucks.

[Source: Ifitsmovies - they've also got a batch of new stills]

30 Comments TAGS: , , , ,

BLACK GODFATHERS GALORE

Written by Vince Mancini / 10.25.07


Watch the red-band trailer for Mr. Untouchable

American Gangster is based on Frank Lucas, a guy who was supposed to be the king of heroin in Harlem in the 70s.  But then today this trailer for Mr. Untouchable, a documentary about Nicky Barnes hit the web.

The movie takes its audience deep inside the heroin industry of the 1970s. The most powerful black drug kingpin in New York City history, Barnes came from humble beginnings to make himself and his comrades rich beyond their wildest dreams, ultimately reaching national infamy in 1977 when the New York Times put him on the front cover of their magazine with the headline Mr. Untouchable.

What the hell dude, how many black heroin kings of Harlem in the 70s were there?  It’s so weird, I live a few blocks from Harlem, and I can’t even imagine crimes ever being commited there.  

In other news, they’re currently making a documentary about me called Mr. Touchable, on account of me being so cuddly.

70 Comments TAGS: , , , ,

Sign Up

Follow Us