With a 100% fresh rating on RottenTomatoes, The King’s Speech is already winning rave reviews, positive buzz, and awards.  In the comically Oscar-baity trailer, Colin Firth cures his stammer, makes a friend, finally tells the woman he loves how he feels, and saves the world from Hitler.  With an impending US release on November 26th, how do you sell a movie like that? Why, with a haphazardly cobbled-together floating head poster, of course.  To hell with the plot, you gotta get the stars in there.  After all, nothing puts asses in the seats like, uh… Colin Firth, and, um… Geoffrey Rush.  Who could forget the guys from 2 Firth 2 Furious?

Anyway, in case you couldn’t detect my sarcasm, this poster sucks, so I went ahead and Busey’d it.

[poster via IMPA]

Here’s the trailer for Toronto Film Festival People’s Choice Award winner and alleged Oscar bait, The King’s Speech, starring Colin Firfff and Helena Bonham Carter, from director Tom Hooper.  Now, I’m not one of those people who immediately sneers when they hear the words “Oscar contender”, because for every couple of Atonements, there’s usually a Hurt Locker or a The Wrestler.  But this movie… Jeez.  It’s like if you boiled a bunch of other Oscar movies down until they became a thick gravy, and then  spoonfed only that to a baby for the first 10 years of its life, and that baby grew up to be Colin Firth.

George VI, also known as Bertie, reluctantly takes the throne of England when his brother, Edward, abdicates in 1936. The unprepared king turns to a radical speech therapist, Lionel Logue, to help overcome his nervous stutter and the two forge a friendship.

Awwww sheeeeeeeit, rich white people be havin’ problems, son!  S-s-s-s-s-s-spit it out, flinchy!  BUT WHERE ARE THE DYSLEXIC NAZIS?  Oi, bugga me norks, guv, da king ‘as got a stutter ‘e ‘as!  Ev’re toime ‘e talks, ‘e gits ‘is tongue aw tied up loike me undacrackaz.  What wiw we tew da proime ministah?  …And that’s when he cured his stutter, made a friend, finally told the woman he loved how he felt, and saved England from Hitler.

“Why should I waste my time listening to you?”

“BECAUSE I HAVE A VOICE!”

In conclusion, in Africa it’s bling-bang, yer changin’ that boy’s life, (*dismissive wank*), forever and ever amen.

The first official stills from Tim Burton’s Alice in Wonderland movie have hit the web, and as one would expect from a Tim Burton Alice in Wonderland movie, they’re pretty trippy.  Johnny Depp channels Kirsten Dunst Madonna as the Mad Hatter and Helena Bonham Carter sports a Nic Cage-like forehead expansion as the Red Queen.  It also stars sexy giraffe Mia Wasikowska (Wasikowska?) as Alice, and Anne Hathaway as the White Queen.

I hope studio execs see this and realize that there’s 2,000+ years worth of literature to choose from and even though I hate most old crap, a 19th century classic is still way better than a videogame or a gd board game.  My hope for this movie is that it’s like Sweeney Todd without all the gay singing.  I also hope they change the it-was-all-just-a-dream ending because Lewis Carroll totally stole that from Dallas.

[via JustJared]

UPDATE: And here’s Anne Hathaway as the White Queen. What did they do to her?  Dark lipliner, ghostly face, harsh eyebrows – looks more like the Chola Queen to me.  Needs more power bangs.  (Also, more art over at USA Today. Thanks, Robopanda)

Helena Bonham Carter has left production on Terminator: Salvation stalled after members of her family died in a car crash.  Bonham plays Serena, "the lead villain."

The actor’s relatives were on a South African safari holiday on Wednesday when the minibus they were travelling in spun out of control and flipped after a tyre burst.
Helena’s cousin, Fiona Bonham Carter, 51, escaped with a broken shoulder. But Fiona’s son Marcus Egerton-Warburton, 14; mother Brenda, 74; stepfather Francis Kirkwood, 75; and sister-in-law Kay Boardman, 54, all died.
The actor was given indefinite leave from the set in Mexico. [New Mexico, actually - Ed.]
"Everyone here was in a state of shock when the news came through," a source said. [News.com.au]

Well jeez, that sucks.  Not to make light of a tragedy, but if I die in Africa I would at least hope rhinos are involved.