Not much story behind this one – just a really awkward interview with Will Smith (he may not be a Scientologist yet, but he sure has the acting like a jovial, narcissistic robot thing down), that someone at Cracked chopped up in order to make Will Smith look like more of a jackass. Really, it’s like shooting fish in a barrel, or slap boxing a kid with cerebral palsy. Not difficult, exactly, but fun.

[Thanks to Robo for the tip] 

Will Smith’s Hancock has begun screening for critics, and the early buzz is not good.  Says Variety’s Anne Thompson:

Based on seeing Hancock the other night, I can tell you this. Todd McCarthy’s early negative review will be one of many. The knives are out, and they are sharp. When this movie opens July 2, it will be eviscerated.

Early on I thought it looked like your basic, blockbuster Will Smith mediocrity, but later I wondered how a project with Peter Berg and Michael Mann involved and based on a much-buzzed "dark" screenplay could be bad.

It’s a movie that tried to be smart and weird and interesting, with gifted filmmakers behind it: producers Michael Mann and Akiva Goldsman, edgy screenwriter Vince Gilligan (Breaking Bad), and director Peter Berg (Friday Night Lights, The Kingdom).  They created a fascinating damaged, alcoholic, homeless superhero, well-played by Smith, but their attempts to mix and match smart character-based drama with superhero action adventure is a Frankenstein’s Monster.

It’s amazing how often studio people confuse movies being successful in spite of being stupid with movies being successful because they were stupid.  Now their strategy seems to be to dumb down anything that sounds too interesting.  Then again, Frankenstein’s Monster did drown a little girl, so it might not be all bad.  You know what they say, parents just don’t understand.  

Those kooky NYC subway pranksters are at it again.  You may have seen their work last month when they turned The Happening into The Penis.  This time they’ve spliced some of Eddie Murphy’s face from a Meet Dave ad into the Hancock poster and re-tooled the tagline to read “Will Smith is Hitch.  Again.”

This reminds me of the time my friend passed out and I wrote “Cock Butt” on his forehead in Sharpie.  Sadly, he died of alcohol poisoning later that night.  And later, at the funeral, when people wondered aloud why it was a closed casket, my buddies and I all smiled knowingly at each other.  Ahh, good times.  Rest in Peace, Cock Butt.

[/Film] 

During what I can only assume was a slow news day in the U.K., the Sun yesterday devoted an entire article to the story that workers putting up a billboard for the premiere of Hancock had decided to work back to front.  Their headline?  "Big Willy’s film is a load of c**ck."  Now, I can understand calling Will Smith "Big Willy", because "Willy" is Brit slang for penis.  But a load of cock?  It looks like just one cock to me.  And anyway, if there were a load, wouldn’t it be a load of cocks?   Does cock even come in loads?  …Don’t answer that.

Scaffolders appeared to spell the name of the superhero film backwards, erecting the last four letters before the first three were mounted. This meant that just as it was time for a fag break, the only letters in place rudely spelt out c**k providing plenty of giggles for the labourers. [Emphasis added]

This just in, The Sun is even more immature than I am.  

[Thanks to Robo for the tip] 

Will Smith was on the Ellen show the other day (apparently the topic was So, You’re Boring and Rich)  and unveiled this spoilerish new clip from Hancock. In it, he reveals to Jason Bateman and Charlize Theron how his character got his name and that he doesn’t age.

I’m still on the fence about Hancock.  I like Peter Berg, but the previews look cheesy.  Maybe it’s just professional jealousy.  See, I also wrote a script about an anti-social superhero, but the suits rejected it.  They said two hours of a guy using his X-ray vision to jack off while watching girls pee was in poor taste.  Well la di da, Professor Fancypants.