Huggalos rejoice, it’s a Ryan Gosling story! So Canada’s hottest export, that snuggly bundle of politeness and butterscotch pudding, Ryan Gosling, was recently spotted canoodling† with Eva Mendes, his co-star in the upcoming Place Beyond the Pines. Word on the street is that she could be Baby Goose’s new girlfriend, because he took her to Disneyland, and that’s totally his move. “Hey, girl. Lemme see those C-cups on the teacups, nah mean?” -From the upcoming Baby Goose/Channing Tatum body swap comedy.

Paparazzi snapped the “Crazy Stupid Love” heartthrob, 30, getting smoochy at the California theme park with sexy Eva Mendes, 37, his co-star in “The Place Beyond the Pines,” in which they play husband and wife.

I’ve been sad ever since Baby Goose broke up with fellow talented, adorable Canadian Rachel McAdams, so it’s hard to see him with another woman. My God, they’re both so cute, their baby would’ve come out covered in glitter and Lucky Charms marshmallows. But at the end of the day, all I really want is for Baby Goose to be happy.

The head-turning couple — both sporting baseball caps — were spotted over the weekend playing games, going on rides and wearing 3-D glasses. According to Us magazine, Mendes even fed Gosling “churros, cotton candy and corn on the cob.”

(*Eva Mendes feeds Baby Goose a churro*)
“Mmm, I’ve never had Mexican food before! Haha, interracial dating is super neat. Here, girl, sample the cuisine of my people.”(*feeds Eva Mendes cotton candy*)

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Rosario Dawson, Paul Rudd, and Eva Mendes at the Independent Spirit Awards.  I want to live in this picture.  If I could be reincarnated as anything, I’d choose Paul Rudd. Paul Rudd or a sea otter. |Buzzfeed|

MORNING LINKS

The Gnarly Sheen pyramid of greatness. |WarmingGlow|

Is a planet being born as we speak? |GammaSquad|

RIP, soccer owl. |WithLeather|

Extreme underwater ice hockey. |TheDailyWhat|

Lesson learned: don’t talk smack about a guy in a car while you’re standing in the middle of the street. |BostonBarstoolSports|

Prostitute Mickey, episodes 1 – 4. |GorillaMask|

The 25 greatest bikini scenes in cinema history. |ScreenJunkies|

Holy Taco’s video of the day. |HolyTaco|

Yo, it’s an At-At made of snow, yo. Still waiting for the other shoe to drop on internet Star Wars reference.  Stiiiiilll waaaaiting. |UnrealityMag|

Taylor Momsen stars in “goth slut goes to Starbucks”. True story, I had to google Taylor Momsen after this. |WWTDD|

Kim Kardashian’s new single sounds like robot’s death fart. |TheSuperficial|

After the jump: DID DAVID LETTERMAN RIP US OFF??
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The minute I told friends I loved Werner Herzog’s Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans, they asked, “You mean because it’s good or because it’s a train wreck?”

The truth is, I don’t really know.  Imagine The Wire as written by Shane Black.  It rides the line between brilliant and brilliantly terrible so well, all I know is that I loved every minute of it and I couldn’t turn away*.  Like rock n’ roll, there’s something about a movie being almost bad that makes it infinitely better.

Now, before I get to my wholehearted recommendation, (and a wholehearted recommendation is what this is, in case you wanted to save yourself the trouble of reading the rest), I feel I should first clarify that if the crowd at the screening I attended is at all representative, a lot of people will not like this movie.  But I believe I can provide a handy guide to the type of person who will or won’t.  I illustrate by way of a story:  Last week for Halloween, I dressed in a giant penguin suit with a fake mustache, an outfit I thought was pretty self-explanatory.  And yet, a significant number of people came up to me throughout the night to ask, “What are you supposed to be?”

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ACHTUNG!  Jawohl, Werner Herzog here.

Das ist za new traila for mein new movie, Bad Lieutenant.  First, I varn you.  Zees movie I make, ees not for eweryone.  I do not make zees movie for bouncing, rosy-cheeked boy oont girl whose laughter burns mein ears like za morning sunlight burns mein skin.  Zees movie, ees not meant for cheeldwen, housevifes, zee elderly, or Juden.  Mein movie, I make for zose who haff vorked as lockpicks, bouncers een sex clubs, fluffers at rave parties, deesgruntled dildo merchant — za true poets uff za vorld!  Za hero uff mein movie ist ein policeman, who start off wholesome, like disgusting rule-folloving bubi scout.  Zen one day, za policeman meet Xzibit.  Zen he take za drugs, zen he take za whores, zen murder, zen iguanas — he begin to live like za true poet!

Oont I choose for mein lead role za horrible forehead monster, Neekolas Cage.  Because ven I look eento za eye uff za Cage monster, I see only blackness, zee cold eendifference uff true poetry.  I vould say to him, “Release za pigs!”  Oont za Cage monster vould shout, “YES, MEIN FÜHRER!”  A true soldier. Oont ven za producers come, viss their herbal teas oont yoga classes, zey tell me, “But Verner, ve are sad, for ziss movie haff too many iguana.”  Zo I tell zem, zees sniveling urine-pants, zat eef zey take mein iguana, I vould cut off mein nose oont mail it to za pope, for zat ees poetry.  Oont za Cage monster, it agrees. I train za Cage monster to luff zee iguana. Zen za producer, he decide he vill let me haff mein iguana, because he fear for za Cage monster.  Oont zees, zees ees za most important sing you vill ever learn about za movie business.

[via Yahoo]

I’ve got a bone to pick with this new poster for Werner Herzog’s Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. Listen, any time you take Nic Cage and have him take direction from the German guy who got shot in the belly by a sniper and laughed about it, and have them remake a movie that was already pretty whacked out to begin with, and have Cage demand his lucky crack pipe in the trailer… THIS SAILOR IS ONBOARD *points to self with thumbs*.  At this point, there really isn’t anything you could do to keep me from seeing this movie.  That said, how you gonna make a Nic Cage poster without his forehead or ridiculous hair in it?  This is a Nic Cage movie poster.  Showing Nic Cage without the forehead is like showing Diora Baird without the boobs, or a platypus without the bill.  NOW IT’S JUST A STUPID BEAVER WITH A POISONOUS BARB ON IT’S LEG, ARE YOU HAPPY NOW?

[ComingSoon]