I’d been hearing about this one for a few months now, and finally there’s a trailer to share.  It’s called Exporting Raymond.  It’s a documentary about the creator of Everybody Loves Raymond, Phil Rosenthal, who gets called to Moscow to help develop a Russian version of his show. Just imagine all the stupid bullsh*t you’d have to go through in order to develop a show here in America, then set that in Russia, where the biggest television studio apparently has feral dogs roaming the lot, and put the whole thing through Google Translate, and that’s basically this movie.  Suffice to say, I’m sold.

“Thees Raymond, why him funny?  I no think him funny.  And Sergei know funny.  I once kill Chechen weess banana.  …Banana wery rare een Russia.”

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Here I was, all set to do my normal Weekend Preview post while smoking a pipe in my dinner jacket, when I realized that this week’s offerings included a Justin Bieber biopic and that Adam Sandler movie. (But also Cedar Rapids, which is great, if you live in one of these cities).  If you’re not a true Belieber and/or Brooklyn Decker in a bikini isn’t enough to make you overlook Jennifer Aniston as a love interest, as an alternative, you can watch a documentary about badass street gangs from the 70s for free right here.

From Vice:

Gangs these days are f*cking boring. There’s no showmanship or flair involved any more. New York City gangs in the 70s and 80s had style by the assload. Each gang had their own theme, be it wearing SS helmets with ripped-up leather jackets or carrying a gigantic sword while sporting a beret, things were undoubtedly more badass back then.

80 Blocks From Tiffany’s was made in 1979 by Gary Weis, who used to make shorts for Saturday Night Live back in the good old days. If you’re at all interested in gang culture, you’ve probably already seen it, or at least heard of it. It was originally released in 1985 but was, for most of its existence, really, really hard to find.

WELL NOT ANYMORE!  NOW YOU CAN WATCH IT FOR FREE ON THIS VERY INTERNET WEBSITE!  It’s basically the real-life, less cute version of The Warriors.  But with similar, stylized, sleeveless denim vests.  So, still kind of cute.  Check it out below.

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A nation of college freshman stonededly swooned in approbation today as it was announced that The Eagle director Kevin MacDonald would helm a big-budget documentary about the life of Bob Marley, the most important cultural icon ever to grace a black-light poster.

Macdonald, whose past docs have included One Day in September and Touching the Void [I directed the porn parody of the same name -Ed], is said to have been granted unpredented access to the Marley’s family’s private archives and will, with their cooperation, attempt a definitive look at the artist’s life and work.

The official press releases describes the project as follows:

Bob Marley’’s universal appeal, impact on music history and his role as a social and political prophet is both unique and unparalleled. His music and message transcend culture, language and creed and resonate around the world today as powerfully as when he was alive. Only a handful of musicians have ever achieved such an impact and Bob Marley, though his life was far too short, stands among them. [ComingSoon]

It’s true, the political landscape changed forever in the wake of Marley’s landmark speech, We’re Jammin’, in which he famously declared, “We’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin, we’re jammin,” and perhaps even more importantly, “and we hope you like jammin too.”

I enjoy my Bob Marley Greatest Hits CD as much as the next guy, but do we really have to treat every guy who wrote good songs like they wrapped the entire planet in puppy tummy fur?  I mean, a “prophet,” really?  Who do they think he is, Tom Cruise?

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This is the trailer for ‘Total Badass,’ which calls itself “an insanely funny and wickedly debaucherous documentary about crime, sex, art, drugs, music, and life in the Austin Underground.”

It’s hard to tell any of that from the actual trailer, in which a guy mainly walks around talking about his life on his way to some sort of guinea pig competition which looks like it’s being staged in an office kitchen during a lunch break.  But damned if it doesn’t have a couple one liners that made me shoot snot bubbles out of my nose.

“I took a year off to raise guinea pigs and do cocaine.”

I remember when my dad took me to a wig store.  I was about your age.”

It looks like it just finished a screening tour, so hopefully we’ll get a DVD or limited release soon.  “Tell me again about the guinea pigs and the cocaine, George.”

Jimmy McMillan, distinguished candidate of the Rent is Too Damn High Party and future mustache hall of famer, lost his bid for New York Governor earlier this month, but in the process, gained something much more valuable.  As a karate expert, I don’t really know what that something is, but perhaps this new documentary can enlighten us.  It’s called DAMN!, named after an expression white people like to imagine black people using.

Thanks to 91 intrepid investors, filmmakers Aaron Fisher-Cohen and Kristian Almgren received just enough funding over Thanksgiving to finish editing their McMillan-centric documentary, DAMN!

Their goal now is to finish the editing process in the next couple of months, with eyes on debuting the film at SXSW in March. But won’t the Jimmy McMillan hype-machine be out of gas by the time 2011 arrives, if it isn’t sputtering on fumes already? “Great art is often timeless,” Cohen wrote. “I don’t expect Jimmy McMillan to be very popular upon the release, but I don’t think that will hinder our story, or who he is as a person, which is what will make this film great.” [Movieline]

Great art is timeless, but you know what’s EVEN MORE timeless?  Karate expertise.  Anyway, I’m all for more McMillan, but hearing a guy from Brooklyn with a hyphen name talk about “great art” makes my neck feel all warm.  I think it might be phantom scarf pangs.

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