Why yes, that *is* Vanilla Ice rapping with a small child.

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[Download this week's episode here (right-click, "save as.")]

This week on the Frotcast, we brought on our old friend Laremy Legel from Film.com to discuss Cowboys & Aliens, so we did that for a few seconds, and then we talked about how terrible this week’s trailers are, and then we brought on Burnsy to try to pick the song of the summer.

Episode notes:

• 4:00 – Me saying “respect” to C-Tates and asking Gina Carano a question at Comic-Con
• 10:00 – Steven Spielberg takes the stage to collect his fake Comic-Con award and give a cheesy speech
• 13:22 – We talk Attack the Block, briefly.
• 15:00 – We make fun of Battleship for a while. “So there’s an… ocean robot? That turns into a plane?”
• 19:35 – We make fun of New Year’s Eve for a while
• 37:00 – We talk Cowboys and Aliens
• 53:00 – DON’T MISS! We bring on Burnsy to try to find the song of the summer.

Email us at Frotcast@Gmail.com, Subscribe on iTunes, and download this week’s episode here (right-click, “save as.”)

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BREAKING NEWS UPDATE: There is an Apache extra in Cowboys and Aliens whose name is “Freddy Apache.” Freddy Apache, the Apache, who plays an Apache. Really, it makes a lot of sense when you think about it.

[related: Our friend Evan's Tumblr, DumbNamesInMovies. My all-time favorite is "Yolanda Squatpump."]

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PAUL BLART ZOOKEEPER. (Original poster here). Ignore what the actual poster, trailer, and all the marketing materials say, the true title of this film is “Paul Blart Zookeeper.” You know it, I know it, and Paul Blart himself knows it. In this latest poster, it commits the cardinal sin of the “Rom-Com Lean” poster cliché. Well, I call it a sin, but it’s not like this movie could look any more terrible. At this point, it’s just honest advertising. Still, I like the poster I made better:

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The new extended trailer for Cowboys and Aliens premiered the other night on Spike TV’s Guy’s Choice Awards and I missed it, probably because I’d rather watch my grandma’s cakefarts video than regular Spike programming. But now it’s online, and you can watch it below without interruption of Kevin James promos.  Cowboys opens July 29th, and I’m still not sure what to make of it.  While it certainly sounds like Hollywood’s favorite action movie clichés decided to get together and play limp biscuit onto a script, as far as mash-ups of tropes go, I’ll take Cowboys‘ alien invasion, amnesia, rocket hands, and Indiana Jones over Super 8‘s sad kids with daddy issues in love any day (if I find out Daniel Craig keeps his dead wife’s picture in a locket I swear to God I’m walking out). What can I say, I do enjoy aliens and explosions and rocket hands and Olivia Wilde naked (PG-13 naked, of course).  As long as restraint is no object, some dinosaurs, the predator, and a vampire cyborg might’ve been nice. Come on, it’ll be like if Sucker Punch wasn’t secretly about child rape.

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Things have obviously been a little crazy around here this week, what with all of the Gloria Allreds of the Interwebs putting a bounty on Vince’s testicles. That’s why I thought a great way to turn the page and start fresh would be to offer up a little peace treaty to all you intelligent, classy broads out there. In fact, even as our beloved Chodin has been away on assignment on Fire Island, he still found time to whisper in my ear from behind that we should give the ladies some eye candy to show that FilmDrunk isn’t a sexist haven for the web’s derelicts.

With that said, there’s no better way to say, “I respect females” than by giving them a gallery of the upcoming summer’s hottest movie bulges. An action hero isn’t an action hero if he doesn’t have a divine codpiece or some sort of crotchal decoration that screams, “This crotch belongs to a mother f*cking star!” And this summer is full of decorated crotches, so we hope that you ladies – and movie codpiece enthusiast men – enjoy this little trivia challenge that we’ve put together for you.

See if you can score 100 and become a Divine FilmDrunk Crotch Hound…

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