Piranha 3DD has a trailer and you can watch it below. The gist of it is that the piranhas have invaded a water park this time. Yes, a water park. At least this way, you can sterilize your bite wounds with all the Mexican pee. Also, David Hasselhoff is there for some reason. Oh, and Ving Rhames has a gun for a leg. This looks good.

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UPDATE 10:41 ET: This version should work:

Piranha 3D had its release date pushed back to August because of money problems at The Weinstein Company, but despite reports saying they might not be able to afford 3D,  the trailer still says “Piranha 3D.”  It’s pretty much what you’d expect — tits, piranhas, Christopher Lloyd, etc. — it basically writes itself.  The plot is that everyone, even Eli Roth, has come out for a wild time at Spring Break at Lake Victoria, except *record snatch* it’s filled with piranhas.  “Lake Victoria” is an odd choice, because the only Lake Victoria I know of is in Africa, which, as I read in National Geographic for Xenophobes, isn’t so much a Spring Break destination as it is a rape destination, or a parasites crawling up your pee hole destination.  Now that I think about it, that actually does sound like Spring Break.

[hat tip: ScreenJunkies]

Christopher Lloyd co-headlined one of the most successful film franchises of all time, so it only follows that 10 years later he’d be starring in a two-part, made-for-Sci-Fi Channel movie called “Knights of Bloodsteel.”  It premiered this April, but it looks like it’s out on DVD now.  Makes a perfect gift for any niece, nephew, or non-native English speaker.

The four-hour, two-part movie tells the tale of Mirabilis, a mythical land chock full of humans, elves and goblins in which the only thing of value, apparently, is a magical metal called bloodsteel. What little remains is controlled by the awful and horrible Dragon Eye.  You can watch it on Sci Fi, but only if you literally have nothing else to do. “Knights of Bloodsteel” is so bad it’s not even good-bad, it’s just bad-bad. [LA Times]

Oh well, as my wise old drunken molesty uncle used to say, you hit some, you whiff some.  And I have faith Christopher Lloyd is headed for a career resurrection.  After all, he does have a starring turn in Santa Buddies: The Search for Santa Paws this winter.  (awesome trailers below)

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Actor Christopher Lloyd, most (only?) famous for the role of Doc Brown in Back to the Future, had his house in Montecito, California destroyed by the recent Southern California wildfire.

The house, Lloyd’s principal residence, was listed for sale in the spring of 2007 at $11.3 million but recently was withdrawn from the market while he made upgrades. He owns a second, smaller, home in Montecito that is still on the market for $3.6 million and was not affected by the blaze.
Lloyd’s fire-damaged property  is one of Montecito’s more unusual homes. The 5,500-square-foot main house has one bedroom, and there is a separate guesthouse. The house was built in 1972 from adobe bricks made on-site. And the living room and bedroom share an outdoor area with a large patio and stone-lined reflecting pool. [LA Times]

The “Tea Fire” which started at the privately owned Tea Garden Estate, about a mile north of Santa Barbara’s Westmont College, ripped through an area that Oprah Winfrey, Michael Douglas, Rob Lowe and other celebrities call home. [CNN]

I’m not going to make a Back to the Future joke here, because it would be way too obvious and everyone’s probably already beaten me to it.  And that’s messed up, the guy’s house burned down.  But I think I speak for everyone when I say: It should’ve been you, Oprah.