When we first heard about David Fincher’s Chef, starring Keanu Reeves, not much was known about the project other than that it was a great opportunity for “There is no spoon” jokes.  MTV recently spoke to the director and if nothing he else, he deserves the award for cryptic nonsense statements.

What can we expect from “Chef”?

“It’s good and chewy,” says Fincher, using terminology that could just as well be applied to delicious meal [thanks for explaining that to us, MTV-writer-guy]. “It’s like a celibate sex comedy if that means anything.” [Nope, not really]

Ultimately, Fincher’s interest in exploring the culinary world comes down to his immense respect for the artistry and craft of top chefs.

“It’s really about the creative process,” the filmmaker explained. “It’s truly an aromatic art-form, making food [you should've seen Jackson Pollack shit his pants]. I love that idea. And I love Keanu’s passion for that world.”

Yes, yes, Keanu is intensely passionate, especially about food.  Why, just the other day someone made him a sandwich.  “Whoa,” said Keanu.  He was simply dumbfounded.

Director David Fincher (Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Fight Club) is attached to a project called Chef, starring Keanu Reeves. I’m gonna be honest here: I read the first two lines of the story, thought up that headline, made the picture, and pretty much checked out after that.  I apologize.

“There is no spoooon….”