Cemetary Junction was written by Ricky Gervais and Stephen Merchant (the same team behind the British Office and Extras).  That’s just about all I need to be interested, but in the interests of looking like I’m working, here’s the synopsis:

Cemetery Junction, set in 1970s England, follows three blue-collar friends who spend their days joking, drinking and chasing girls. [Ha, sounds like us, right, pussies? *slowly hides glass of Chardonnay*] Freddie (Christian Cooke) wants to leave their working-class world, but cool, charismatic Bruce (Tom Hughes) and lovable loser Snork (Jack Doolan) are happy with life the way it is.

Having known plenty of Brits, Scots, Aussies, Kiwis, South Africans, Irishmen, etc., I’d say I’m generally pretty good at understanding accents.  But is it just me, or was like 80% of everything that comes after the first scene completely unintelligible?  I had to watch it like three times and still all I heard was “Oy, cunt, ow’s da dodgy bloke a bob’s yer uncle’s lorrie lift, a bahmy bugga. Oy ‘eard ‘e shoyned da bobby’s boots, ‘e did.”

Also, what’s up with the downer title?  This is a comedy, right?  I’d have gone with Crotch Punch Station, or Banana Peel Alley.

The trailer for The Invention of Lying came out barely a week ago, and yet here’s Ricky Gervais, back with a teaser for Cemetery Junction, which he also co-wrote and co-directed with Stephen Merchant.  It isn’t much, mainly just him and Merchant ripping on Ralph Fiennes.  And for some reason, they give him a total pass on clearly being named “Ralph” yet making everyone refer to him as “Rafe”.  I seem to remember a little film where John Goodman played the king of England and it sure as hell wasn’t “King Rafe.”  Meanwhile, while I was trying to get to the bottom of this, I came upon this story from his Wiki page:

Fiennes stirred controversy in February 2007 when staff aboard a Qantas airline flight from Australia to India caught the actor leaving the same aeroplane lavatory as 38-year-old flight attendant Lisa Robertson. At first denying any allegations of a mid-air tryst, Robertson later confessed to having unprotected sex in the stall with Fiennes, whom she had met just hours before. Fiennes reportedly was en route to Mumbai, India, as a participant in AIDS awareness efforts for UNICEF. The organisation retained Fiennes as an ambassador, but Qantas ultimately relieved Robertson of her duties.  One month after the airline incident, Fiennes again made headlines when he reportedly disturbed sleeping guests at Bruges, Belgium’s high-class Hotel Tuilerieen during a 5 a.m. naked pool romp with four women. The actor was a guest at the hotel while shooting the film In Bruges.

Fine, I guess if your pimp hand is that strong you can keep the silent L.  Btw, sounds like he’s been stirring more than controversy, gnome sayin?  Oh!

…I’m a freak. I like the girls with the boom. I once rawdogged a lady in a aeroplane bafroom, I’m crazy.  Allow me to de-AIDS thee. They hated Duchess but it just don’t phase me…