Kate Upton and her breasts, Larry and Moe. (Not pictured: her pubic hair.)

After the past few weeks with only a few new major studio flicks getting DVD releases, this week we’ve got plenty.  Unfortunately, it’s stuff like The Three Stooges. It’s not all bad though -assuming you like movies with Will Ferrell, Kristen Wiig, Adam Scott, Jon Hamm, Guy Pearce, Clive Owen, Mel Gibson, Ewan McGregor, Willem Dafoe, Tom Hardy, Jackie Mason, Ben Foster, or that dude who played Balki on Perfect Strangers.  That’s right, they are all in new movies hitting DVD this week. Besides those stars, we’ve got flicks about vampires and school shootings and even a found-footage haunted house flick.  There’s even Davy Jones’ final film appearance, and how could you pass that up?

The DVDs:
The Three Stooges
Casa de mi Padre
Friends With Kids
Lockout
Intruders
Get The Gringo
Salmon Fishing In The Yemen
4:44 Last Day On Earth
Deserter
Goldberg – P.I.
Here
Virgin Alexander
Girls Gone Dead
Midnight Son
Hidden Rage
Documenting The Grey Man

The only way to know for certain which film features your favorite Monkee is to keep reading on the next page.  If you’re more of a Micky Dolenz fan, feel free to skip right to the Netflix suggestions by clicking here.

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"Naw son, cops ain't hold 'em sideways."

Opening Errwhere n Sh*t: 21 Jump Street, Casa de mi Padre, Jeff Who Lives at Home

Opening Somewhere: The FP

FilmDrunk Suggests: Did you know that Vince reviewed 21 Jump Street? He liked it. He also like The FP and he interviewed the guys who made it. I’m excited for 21 Jump Street and baking a special batch of my mom’s delicious brownies to share with orphans and the homeless. God bless.

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Proving yet again that they know the quickest way to the internet generation’s heart, Will Ferrell and Nick “Ron Swanson” Offerman showed up on the fourth hour of the Today Show today in robes drinking bloody marys to promote Casa De Mi Padre, which opens this weekend. I don’t have much to add to the internet gold that this already is, other than to say that OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT NOISE? KATHY LEE CLUCKS LIKE A CHICKEN AND IT’S TERRIFYING! Check out the proof below.

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Will Ferrell plays Armando Alvarez in Casa De Mi Padre, a film almost entirely in Spanish, and about as close as it gets to a perfect concept. To promote the soundtrack, which just released a track listing (with the title track sung by Christina Aguilera), Funny or Die is hosting the video for “Yo No Se,” in which Ferrell, Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite (Efren Ramirez), and a fat guy who kind of looks like Horatio Sanz (Adrian Martinez), sing about not knowing why the moon rises or why the blue flower grows (“Why does the blue flower grow?” “Yo no se.”). When you think about it, it’s sort of like the Mexploitation version of ICP’s “Miracles,” which was itself sort of like a violent clown rap version of “What a Wonderful World.”

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Will Ferrell’s Spanish-language, faux-telenovela, Casa De Mi Padre, just released this new publicity still in honor of Valentine’s Day. It’s not Valentine’s Day yet, but I’m posting it anyway, for obvious reasons. It opens March 16th, and the marketing for this has been all but perfect so far, but at this point, is there any way the actual movie could possibly be as good as the idea of the movie? Because the way I imagine it, it’s already the greatest movie ever. It could only go down from here.

Little Known Fact: “Chiva” means goat in Spanish. ERGO, by the transitive property, I’d like to think the literal Spanish translation of chivalry is actually “goat dueling.” Consider that next time you’re being nice to a girl.

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