Broken Lizard’s Slammin’ Salmon released yesterday on DVD and Blu-Ray.  This was supposed to go up then to coincide, but got bumped by Joss Whedon.

If there’s one thing that seems to characterize the Broken Lizard gang other than looking like Hootie and the Blowfish if the singer was Indian, it’s that they don’t try very hard.   I don’t say that to be insulting.  It’s actually what you might call a double-edged sword.  (Though isn’t that pretty much every sword?  How many single-edged swords have you seen?  That’s called a knife.)  Point is, this refusal to turn in much effort sometimes manifests itself in half-assed jokes, for example an annoying restaurant patron who takes up a table while ordering only water and reading War and Peace.  It’s the kind of joke I could imagine myself writing in fifth grade, and if I were to put in a movie, would probably want to add some layers to.  But not Broken Lizard, they just go with it and keep rolling.

Other times, that they can just throw something at the wall and keep rolling whether it sticks or not becomes a strength of theirs, and it comes from that same approach. You give a joke more leeway if it seems  like they just thought of it ten minutes ago, which they probably did.  It doesn’t feel contrived, so the stakes are lower.  It’s improvisational — sometimes it works, sometimes it tanks.

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Sorry folks, there’s just too much news this afternoon for me to romance all of them, so I’m just gonna give each a few quick thrusts and then pass out and hog the bed.

Zach Galifianakis is attached to Miracle Workers, “a supernatural comedy about a guy who is put on a path that has him posing as an exorcist with a pal. The two think they’ve got a good thing going until they’re faced with a real menace.”  Expect Linda Blair to cameo, sucking a prosthetic crucifix out of his ass on an elevator. |ThePlaylist|

Taylor Lautner drops out of Max Steel to focus on Stretch Armstrong.  Hey, isn’t Stretch Armstrong just a cheap knock-off of the main dude from Fantastic Four?  That sounds like a recipe for suck-cess.  Meanwhile, commenter Pauly is still available for the role of Mex Steal. |Vulture|

First pictures of Andy Serkis and Simon Pegg as Burk & Hare, a pair of Irish murderers who killed at least 17 people in 1827-8.  John Landis plans to turn the story into a screwball comedy.  To be fair, it wasn’t that hard to kill Irish people in the 1800s.  You just had to take away their potatoes and watch them refuse to eat fish. *cough* You live on an island! *cough, cough* |/Film|

Nicole Kidman joins Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston in Just Go for It.  I wouldn’t pay $12 to see this, but I’d pay $12 to hit the guy who wrote it in the nuts.  Film that, add record scratch, voila! Sequel.  |Yahoo|

Broken Lizard have signed a deal for Rogue Scholars.  Which is basically Super Troopers with college professors.  Hey, Farva, you want tenure?  Better beer bong this maple syrup, ya chicken f*cker PACAWK!  …Which is to say that I’ll most likely see it. |THR|

OH MY GOD I WANT TO HUG THIS PUPPY. |source|

SITE NEWS: I’m trying to get a weekend preview post up, but my Internet is going in and out faster than your retarded sister’s tampon. Time Warner’s service is apparently spottier than your mom’s period.  So don’t hold your period.  I mean breath.

Broken Lizard, the comedy team from Colgate U. behind Super Troopers, Club Dread, and Beerfest, have a new movie coming out December 11th, The Slammin’ Salmon.  It stars Michael Clarke Duncan as a former boxing champ who offers $10,000 to the waiter who can sell the most fish at his restaurant. Then he threatens hilarity to ensue or else he’ll punch it in the stomach. Will hilarity comply???  Anyway, it looks like it could either be really funny or really stupid, I’m guessing both. 

Haha, “how are you feline.” Because they’re cats, get it? It’s funny ’cause I want to hug them.

So, slight disclaimer on this story: it contains little or no facts, and I’m only posting it only because I’m intrigued by the sheer obscurity of it.  This is the email tip I got:

“Eric Stolhanske from Super Troopers for some odd reason is on a workout video. He appears as one of the workout demonstrators on a series called P90X. He is on the plyometrics disc of the videos and really does a good job.  Not once do they say that he is in movies or is an actor.  They just say that his name is Eric. Also, not only does he do a good job with the workout but the kicker is that he has a prosthetic leg!” [Editor's Note: "The kicker," get it?  Cute.]

I can’t find any video of it online, but there have been discussions about the same topic here, here, here, here, and here, all on obscure websites or “workout blogs.”  I’ve noticed the guy’s leg in his movies, nor does it say anything about it on his Wikipedia or IMDB bio. The next obvious explanation is that there’s just a guy in the P90 videos who looks like Eric Stolhanske.  HOWEVER, it could be that the point of all this was to get us talking about a workout video no one had heard of before today (it’s going straight to the top!  All on the strength of… some guy from Super Troopers!).  SO, if this is some kind of publicity stunt for P90X… I say kudos, on easily the most bizarre, random, diabolical and esoteric publicity stunt ever orchestrated.  This reminds me of that old Tae Bo video Cate Blanchett was in before she was famous.  I hear there’s a labe shot at 12:54 if you pause it just right.

UPDATE: Someone just emailed me what he says are screencaps from the video which appear to verify the story. So, uh, maybe he has a prosthetic and likes to work out.  Good for him.

Michael Clarke Duncan day on FilmDrunk continues with the trailer for Broken Lizard’s Slammin’ Salmon, so grab yourself a Quizno’s flatbread sammy and enjoy.  For those of you not in the know, Broken Lizard is the comedy team that shot to fame with Super Troopers, then decided they wanted to go to Hawaii and hang out with naked chicks all day and made Club Dread.  Then they made Beerfest, a movie about drinking games.  Their movies are stupid (save for the some scenes in Super Troopers which were legitimately brilliant), but sort of endearingly stupid.  Like, that joke sucked, but I do respect that you didn’t try very hard.

The premise of this one is that former boxing champ Cleon Salmon is offering $10,000 to the top-selling waiter in a one-night-only contest at his restaurant.  Sounds great, but I wish Farva would go back to acting like Farva.

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