You might be surprised to hear this, but the $65 million Broadway musical about Spider-man with music by U2 is in the news again, and again sounding not altogether un-disastrous. Just when the actress who played Arachne had finally recovered from her concussion (she got clocked by a rope two weeks ago), the show has been delayed again.

Lead producers have decided again to delay its opening night, now scheduled for Jan. 11, until sometime in February. With preview performances now under way the delay is intended to provide more time for the creators to stage a new final number, make further rewrites to the dialogue and consider adding and cutting scenes and perhaps inserting new music from the composers, U2’s Bono and the Edge.

So basically, rewriting the whole damn thing.  Hmm… (*rubs chin thoughtfully*) …Perhaps you could make it… not a play?

Reflecting the view of some audience members who have criticized the show on blogs, Twitter and Facebook, Ms. Taymor and the producers have concluded that Act II has storytelling problems that need to be fixed. While Act I is a familiar rendition of Peter Parker turning into Spider-Man, Act II is largely the invention of Ms. Taymor and Bono, and includes some major reversals that can be hard to understand in the fast-moving show.

Said one commenter to the show’s Facebook page: FAKE. GAY.  MOAR B00BZ PLZ OR GTFO, KTHXBAI 3===> ~~~ ( o Y o )

Read the rest of this entry »

I hate musicals, not only because the music’s always awful and the actors always have that freakish pageant smiled frozen across their faces, but because you can make a musical out of anything.  I mean really?  Legally Blonde? But, hey, add Huey Lewis songs and a guy chopping up whores with an axe, and suddenly, a musical seems like A REALLY GOOD IDEA.  The American Psycho Musical idea has been around since 2008, but you’ll be happy to know that it’s getting closer and closer to reality.  (*flexes in the mirror while banging Japanese sex pillow*)

“Think Malcolm McDowell singing songs during ‘A Clockwork Orange.’” said Duncan Sheik, the new show’s composer, comparing his musical to a brutal attack scene in the 1971 film.

Sheik, who won a Grammy and two Tonys for writing the songs in the Broadway hit “Spring Awakening,” and playwright Roberto Aguirre-Sacasa signed on in February and have completed the first act, with a full draft expected by early next year.

“There are murders, and they are on stage in full view of the audience,” Aguirre-Sacasa said. “An ax and a chef’s knife will be used. I think there’s going to be a lot of blood.”

* Bateman lures business associate Paul Owen back to his Manhattan apartment. Bateman puts on a raincoat so his designer suit doesn’t get bloody and hacks up Owen with an ax.

* He bumps into “Tom Cruise” in the elevator of the Upper West Side building where they both live. Bateman refers to Cruise’s film “Cocktail” as “Bartender.” Cruise corrects him and points out that his nose is bleeding.

* Bateman and his yuppie friends compare business cards at a swanky Upper East Side restaurant. Noting his peers’ classier cards, Bateman becomes so jealous he finds it hard to breathe. [NYPost]

DAMMIT, BROADWAY!  I know I cruelly ridicule you on a daily basis, but please, for the love of God, just do me this one favor: Actor in a an ATM costume singing a song about wanting to be fed a stray cat. If not for me, then for yourselves.

Most logical people would probably say to themselves, “a $65-million Broadway musical about Spider-man with songs by U2?  That’s a brilliant idea!”.  And yet, surprisingly, things haven’t been going so smoothly for Julie Taymor’s Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark.  The first of the preview shows, originally scheduled for January 2010, then pushed to February, finally happened last night, and just one weekend before December.  Thankfully, everything went off without a hitch.  Haha, just kidding.

- After a two-week delay in performances already this month, which sucked up about $4 million, the producers decided that on Sunday night the show would go on.

- After beginning at 6:54 p.m. — 24 minutes late, mostly because of 1,900 people taking their seats — the show unfolded for 30 minutes with few of the special effects that have been the talk of Broadway this fall.

- At 7:23 p.m., an aerial scene began in Peter Parker’s bedroom to the delight of some audience members — yet it was halted two minutes later with the first of four pauses in Act I, apparently to free the lead actor, Reeve Carney (who plays Peter Parker and is one of those playing Spider-Man), from an aerial harness.

- The fourth and final pause at the end of Act I was the worst glitch of the night by far. Spider-Man had just flown and landed onstage with the musical’s heroine, Mary Jane Watson (played by Jennifer Damiano), in his arms. He was then supposed to zoom off toward the balcony seating area, a few hundred feet away. Instead, a harness and cables lifted Spider-Man several yards up and over the audience, then stopped. A production stage manager, C. Randall White, called for a halt to the show over the sound system, apparently in hopes of fixing and re-doing the stunt.
Crew members, standing on the stage, spent 45 seconds trying to grab Spider-Man by the foot, as the audience laughed and oohed. When they finally caught him, Mr. White announced intermission, and the house lights came on.

$65 million and they can’t get someone to fly around the stage attached to a harness?  (The production budget for Kick-Ass, by comparison, was $30 million).  How much does the circus cost?  I bet it’s a lot less than $65 million, and that sh*t has live elephants.

Read the rest of this entry »

With all the time we spend talking about movies, we often forget about the cinema’s gay cousin, the theatah.  The opening of Julie Taymor’s $60 million, U2-scored Broadway version of Spider-Man (“Spider-Man: Turn off the Dark”), was reportedly delayed again recently. Behind schedule or not, it’s most definitely still happening, and as proof, Vogue recently did a spread on it with photographs by Annie Leibovitz, the famous Jew photographer.  The pictures are either really cool or really ridiculously stupid looking, depending on your perspective.  They’re definitely very Cabinet of Dr. Caligari-esque. Personally, I prefer to focus on how this is a hilarious self-parody on the level of Waiting for Guffman meets Spinal Tap.  Some excerpts from the article:

“In another, the choreographer Daniel Ezralow, a Momix founder and frequent Taymor collaborator, is working with a group of arachno–chorus girls, who, requiring eight stiletto heels each, could be described as unusually leggy.”

“Taymor and her cowriter, Glen Berger, have taken the basic contours of the familiar story and added elements of their own, including a geek chorus that comments on the action and a new supervillain drawn from Greek mythology.”

Carney, whose stunts are performed by a team of Spideys, says he strongly identifies with the role: “I’m a gentle, thoughtful person offstage—at least I try to be. But onstage, I turn into a bit of an animal. I guess that’s the Spider-Man in me.”

Anyone else imagine him singing that last part?  “I gueeeesss that’s just, the spiiiiider-man…. iiiiinn mmeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee…”   I also like to imagine Anna Wintour storming through the Vogue offices demanding that the Spider-Man spread be more fabulous.  “This is Spider-Man on Broadway, not Margaret Cho headlining some Chuck E. Cheese.  Now fetch me a sugar-free vanilla latte, you fat cow! And change into something a hobo didn’t give birth in!”

[bigger pictures available at Vogue]

Sorkin, Jackman, and Elfman, who sound like some sort of Cosplay porn version of Justice League, are working together on a Broadway musical about Houdini.  Hugh Jackman will play the lead, Aaron Sorkin will write the script, and Danny Elfman will compose the score.  Sources say Sorkin will draw his inspiration from the real life of Harry Houdini, and then add Hugh Jackman singing gay songs.

An impressive creative team has quietly assembled around the project, including playwright Aaron Sorkin, composer Danny Elfman, lyricist Glenn Slater, and director Jack O’Brien — and despite repeated delays, Elfman says work on Houdini is now well underway.
Next up is a first reading of the script, scheduled for January. After that, Elfman estimates that the show could open in early 2012 — though we wouldn’t be surprised to see it on Broadway even sooner if the reading goes well. [Popwatch]

I won’t pretend I understand musicals.  Maybe it would help if they stopped making musicals about absolutely anything.  But I am interested in the idea of Aaron Sorkin writing one.  Seems like Hugh Jackman’s major challenge will be his ability to carry a tune with the back-up singers constantly interrupting him to clarify something he sang three lines ago.

"Help, I cahn't escape from me collah, lol."