All right, first thing is first – we ain’t getting political here. I’m just reporting some movie news. That said, John Cusack is about to get all political on our asses. The star of Gross Pointe Blank and that terrible movie where he gets stuck in that hotel room and he can never leave and Samuel L. Jackson is yelling at him about it is developing a film entitled Rush, apparently about the life of bloated sack of wind radio mouthpiece Rush Limbaugh. “This is great,” said nobody, because this will only lead to a complete mess.

So why the hell would Cusack and director Betty Thomas even bother with this nonsense, Yahoo!?

Limbaugh is in the front ranks of colorful and provocative media figures. Earlier this year, Limbaugh called a Georgetown law student a “slut” and a “prostitute” on air for arguing to Democrats in Congress that health plans should pay for contraception.

Oh no he didn’t!

This week, the host mocked Republican New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie for his “bromance” with Obama after Christie praised the president’s response to the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy.

Bromance! Topical! But Cusack as Rush Limbaugh? That doesn’t make sense.

Cusack as Limbaugh isn’t typecasting, politics aside. Cusack is a slender, dark-haired 46-year-old, while Limbaugh is 61, balding and portly. But Hollywood’s makeup experts have probably had greater challenges.

Oh snap, Yahoo!. Oh snap, indeed. But the important question is, what does Yahoo! commenter Buckethead think about this?

John Cusak. Another piece of Hollywood garbage and communist.

Well said, Mr. Head. Well said.

Bear with me, folks, this one requires a journey deep down the rabbit hole. So, American Pie‘s Pie effer in Chief Jason Biggs is apparently voicing Leonardo in a new Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles show for Nickelodeon. (Stay with me here, we’ve got a long way to go). In promoting the show, Nickelodeon apparently promoted Biggs’ Twitter account. Meanwhile, a website called Twitchy, clearly doing the Lord’s work, took it upon themselves to catalog every “lewd” thing Biggs tweeted, clutching their pearls all the while and eventually calling for a boycott of Nickelodeon.

Some of Biggs’ offending tweets (asterices added by me – blame your workplace’s family filters):

If your sweater has buttons and buckles on it, you are very good at sucking d*ck. #TheBachelorette

I bet the top priority for a women’s basketball team equipment manager is to make sure they have enough dental dams. And then basketballs.

Just got emailed another birth announcement. Damn, there are a lot of Jewgly kids in Hollywood.

Happy we’re clamping down on texting while driving, but when is being Asian while driving going to become illegal?

If Twitter is a penis, then she totally swallows. #FF my wife, @jennyandteets [What the hell does that even mean? How does a penis swallow? Ugh. -Ed]

“your pussy isn’t allergic to pussy, is it?” – my husband, defending his attempt to finger me after petting a feral cat -Jenny Mollen

I’d totes dip a pinky or two in Paul Ryan’s wife’s bleached assh*le (she obvs bleaches her assh*le). #RNC

“@jennyandteets: People are cheering off screen because Janna Ryan is showing her tits! #RNC”

Clint Eastwood talking to a non-responsive stool sorta sums up Christianity in a nutshell, huh Republicans? #RNC

You know, just your basic, not-nearly-as-funny-as-I-think-I-am actor tweets. Feel free to check out Biggs’ wife Jenny Mollen’s completely insufferable blog for 10,000 more words of that (a few people have suggested that I do an in-depth breakdown of her latest, but, while it would surely be big traffic, I don’t think I could handle the sheer volume of negativity it would require of me). Anyway, poor Jason apparently understimated how much the wingnut media cares about a B-list actor’s tweets when that B-list actor insults Republicans.

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In 2010, Josh Fox released a documentary called GasLand, about the effects of a method of natural gas drilling technique called fracking, which involves forcing millions of gallons of chemically-treated water underground to shatter rock and release trapped natural gas. Critics say it can contaminate drinking water, while proponents say it’s totally boss and the clean electricity it generates helps them shred on the keytar. Gasland profiled people who lived in places where the drilling had been done, who suffered adverse effects to their health and could do wonderfully cinematic things like light their tapwater on fire.

Yesterday, Fox was arrested while trying to film a congressional hearing by the House Science Committee on fracking, for a sequel to his documentary for HBO, Gasland: Bigger and Gassier. (Note: not actual title)

Fox was led out in handcuffs by the Capitol police shortly after 10 a.m., before the hearing could be gaveled into order. The “Gasland” director was attempting to film the hearing looking into EPA’s investigation of potential water contamination from natural gas drilling in Pavillion, Wyo.
“I’m within my First Amendment rights, and I’m being taken out,” Fox shouted as he was led away.
Fox has been charged with unlawful entry, according to Capitol police spokeswoman Sgt. Kimberly Schneider.
An ABC news crew was also turned away from the hearing. The committee chairman has the discretion on whether to allow uncredentialed members of the media to film hearings, according to a democratic staffer.
The committee recessed after Rep. Brad Miller (D-N.C.) called a motion to suspend the committee rules and allow for Fox and the ABC crew to film the hearing.
“… it’s clear we have space in this room to film this hearing,” Miller said. “If you claim that rule does not allow them to film, or allows you the discretion to turn them away, I move the rules be suspended so the fella who wanted to film for HBO be allowed to film this hearing and that ABC be allowed to film this hearing and all God’s children be allowed to film this hearing until the room is too full for us to conduct our business.”
Before Miller’s motion, subcommittee chairman Rep. Andy Harris (R-Md.) noted that the hearing is being webcast and that anyone filming the hearing would need the appropriate press credentials.
The hearing resumed nearly 30 minutes later, after Republicans voted to table both Miller’s motion to allow the filming and a second motion to recess the hearing. [Politico]

These hearings would be a lot more exciting if in order to table someone’s motion, you had to bodyslam him through a table like in wrestling. Then only the chairman could intervene, with a folding chair.

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