I'm so confused!

Yesterday, we brought you the interesting story about the super secret wedding of Green Lantern and Van Wilder star Ryan Reynolds and actress Blake Lively that took place at the Boone Hall Plantation in Mt. Pleasant, South Carolina. That’s important to note because that’s the same place that The Notebook was filmed at and… wait, Ryan Gosling is Canadian. Ryan Reynolds is Canadian. *draws things in the air with finger, types 80085 on calculator* CANADA IS INVADING SOUTH CAROLINA!

Or probably not. My math is a little fuzzy. But if I can get confused and start developing Red Dawn level conspiracies based on a simple news story, then I’m sure that other people were probably confused, too. And I’m right, because Twitter is like a giant game of drunk telephone with someone Tweeting a random statement like “Katie Holmes bought a new pair of shoes” and it eventually being manipulated into “Kelsey Grammar invokes 4th Reich, marries dog.”

So obviously, when someone reported that Ryan Reynolds married Blake Lively at the site where The Notebook was filmed, that turned into Blake Lively married Ryan Gosling, because our generation has the attention span of… I wonder what defense to play in fantasy football this week.

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By now, bros and babes everywhere have gone through significant mourning periods, with the news that leggy fox Blake Lively secretly married chiseled dude Ryan Reynolds over the weekend, despite knowing that he was in both Green Lantern and Blade: Trinity. But what a lot of sites failed to report as they came up with cute couple nicknames like BlakeNolds and RyLy was that the actual wedding ceremony took place at the very same place that The Notebook was filmed.

A source confirms to PEOPLE that the couple tied the knot Sunday night at Boone Hall Plantation in Mt. Pleasant, S.C., just outside of Charleston.

The reception took place in a white tent at the plantation on Sunday evening. Florence Welch (of Florence and the Machine), a good friend of the Gossip Girl star, performed three songs live, and there was also a deejay who spun tunes. PEOPLE also confirmed that a cake was being driven down from Virginia for the event.

Florence from Florence and the Machine? That’s baller, yo.

As soon as I read this, I went out on the street and interviewed 100 random girls. I asked whether or not they thought it was strange that Reynolds, an actor, married his actress girlfriend at the same location that was used in filming a romantic drama that isn’t even 10 years old. The majority of them responded, “HELP! POLICE!” because I wasn’t wearing pants, so this poll was actually of no use.

Maybe it’s just me, but I think there’s cheesy and then there’s marrying a girl at a mansion that was used in a film based on a Nicholas Sparks novel. Obviously I’m not much of an expert here, because I’m a dick and I laugh at the end of The Notebook, but this is like if Channing Tatum had married Jenna Dewan at Nakatomi Plaza because, “Yo Die Hardz wuz da mutha f*ckin’ bizznomb bomb, son, WHAT.”

It’s time for another installment of This Week in Posters, and this week C-Tates and friends are here to kick this party off right! (*thrusts hips, throws shirt at audience, trips over coffee table*) The official theater rules for my press screening say shirts are required, but I think I saw a lot laaawbreakers in the mirror. (*rubs belly*)

Prediction: Nine months from next week, there will be a spike in the birth rate. This will be known as the “Magic Mike Spike.”

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"Chill, babe. I gots this."

With Rotten Tomatoes scores currently throbbing at 97% (critics) and 98% (audience expectations), Marvel’s The Avengers is the perfect film to kick off the summer movie season this Friday. Sure, some people might argue that the summer movie season actually begins with Miley Cyrus’ LOL – also being released this Friday – but those people need to go back to singing “Achy Breaky Heart” at my nephew’s Bar Mitzvah, dammit.

Beyond The Avengers are some films that actually have us pretty excited about Hollywood’s collective IQ for once – but don’t you worry, there’s also plenty of crap coming out, too. Fortunately, this isn’t the end of the year, so I don’t have to focus on the crap just yet – I will still eventually see LOL because Vince loves watching my soul cripple – and we’re just examining the films that have the greatest potential to crash the box office this season, and put smiles back on the faces of the billionaires who only made hundreds of millions in 2011.

I’ve even taken the liberty of breaking the summer movies up into categories for your convenience (chronological list on the last page), and I am being assisted in presenting this guide by none other than Michael Bay’s pet tiger, Todd Brad.

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MTV just released the trailer for Oliver Stone’s Savages, but since that version is region-locked, I’ve got your YouTube copy after the jump.

Oliver Stone adapts author Don Winslow’s best-selling novel into this all-star ensemble crime drama about a pair of peaceful, Laguna Beach marijuana dealers on who are targeted for extortion by the ruthless Mexican Baja Cartel.

Kick-Ass‘s Aaron Johnson plays the Buddhist hippie, and Taylor Kitsch his business partner who conveniently trained as a Navy SEAL. Blake Lively plays their mutual love interest, and Salma Hayek and Benicio Del Toro are the bad guys.

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