"Get out of the way, lady, my Corvette is dirty."

After the jump, it’s the red-band trailer for Bad Teacher, starring Cam’ron Diaz and Justin Timberlake.  I read this script a while back and really liked it, but then Sony hired Cameron Diaz to play the lead and her then-boyfriend Justin Timberlake to play her love interest, the kind of decision that only makes sense if you’re a studio exec.  On the plus side, Jake Kasdan is directing (of Orange County and the criminally underrated Walk Hard) and Jason Segel has a supporting role.  Maybe I can still pretend to buy Cameron Diaz in this role long enough to enjoy it?  It’s going to be hard, but if I can get Burnsy to stop feeding me popcorn with his big man paws like he usually does, I might be able to manage.

Read the rest of this entry »

Picture unrelated

Oh my God, it’s a top 10 list!  Everyone drop everything and gawk at its numerical definitude!  So every year, midlevel studio exec Franklin Leonard compiles his Black List, a list of the “most liked” as-yet-unmade screenplays in Hollywood.  (Recent Black List script movies include: The Beaver, The Switch, The Social Network, No Strings Attached…)  The LA Times just posted the top 10, and most of them sound a little… familiar.

49 votes: “College Republicans” by Wes Jones. Aspiring politician Karl Rove leads a dirty campaign for College Republican chairman under the guidance of Lee Atwater. Anonymous Content producing. [Political exposé, sounds like Fair Game/Casino Jack/Social Network -Ed.]

47 votes: “Jackie” by Noah Oppenheim. Jacqueline Kennedy’s life immediately after her husband’s assassination. Darren Aronofsky directing for Fox Searchlight. [Biopic of a famous person...]

45 votes: “All You Need Is Kill” by Dante Harper. A new army recruit in a war against aliens finds himself caught in a time loop. Set up at Warner Bros. Doug Liman may direct. [Aliens. Time travel. Source Code meets Cowboys vs. Aliens, say.]

43 votes: “Safe House” by David Guggenheim. A young man at a CIA-run safe house must help a rogue ex-agent escape assassins. Universal Pictures to produce with Daniel Espinoza to direct. Ryan Reynolds and Denzel Washington to star. [aka The Bourne Unstoppable.]

Read the rest of this entry »

The trailer for The Beaver, the Jodie Foster-directed film about Mel Gibson and his talking beaver puppet has finally hit the web, and you’ll be happy to know that for the first time, googling “beaver” and “trailer” doesn’t pull up a picture of your mom.  Anyway, I was really looking forward to this movie, and I was worried a little thing like Mel Gibson insulting all the races of the world might jeopardize us ever seeing it.  Luckily, not everyone’s a sensitive little flower like the cast of The Hangover, and it will reportedly hit theaters in Spring. (Unless the theaters keep running their mouth and end up buried in the rose garden).

So, now that we’ve seen the trailer… uh, what the hell is this?  Call me crazy, but when I heard Mel Gibson would play an alcoholic who starts speaking through a beaver puppet he found in the trash can, I was expecting a comedy, not uplifting piano music and some bizarre version of The Blind Side.

MEL GIBSON, YER CHANGIN’ THAT BEAVER’S LAAHFE!

BLOOOOW ME!

"The way you're dressed, beaver, you're lucky there's only one white fist up your ass."

[Apple via FirstShowing]

Who says these have to be mutually exclusive?

Jodie Foster’s Beaver may not open wide in the U.S. (which is a travesty of sapphic epic proportions), but things are looking up:

Digital Spy noticed that the film has been given a release date in the U.K., and it’s surprisingly soon: it will open on February 11th, against Black Swan, Just Go With It, No Strings Attached, and Yogi Bear. It’s being distributed by Icon, the British/Australian distributor founded and owned by Gibson himself—it obviously helps if the disgraced star of your latest movie also owns the company releasing it. [ThePlaylist]

Releasing the weekend before Valentine’s Day?  Because nothing says romance like Mel Gibson working out his issues with a therapy puppet.  I’m getting all hot just thinking about it.  Oh man, I hope this gets a full release (heh heh) in the US at the same time, so I can buy my Valentine a ticket to this and a box of chocolates (in that order) and put them with a note that says, “You should just smile and blow me.”  I find the earnest sentiments are always the most effective.

I might be the only person alive who didn’t think My Super Ex-Girlfriend was as terrible as everyone said, but the conventional wisdom is that Ivan Reitman hasn’t made a decent movie since the early 90s.  Before he starts work on Ghostbusters 3 (assuming Bill Murray actually agrees to it), he ran a little warm-up lap with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman.

From a Liz Meriwether Blacklist script called “F*ckbuddies,” No Strings Attached follows two attractive single caucasians who decide to go from platonic best friends to lovers, all the while trying to lay ground rules that keep it from turning into a real relationship.  I don’t know about you, but I think I liked this better when it was a Seinfeld episode.  And Ashton Kutcher wasn’t in it.  And Jerry and Elaine didn’t fall in love during the 90-second promo.

If only David Carradine had agreed to star in this, he’d probably still be alive today.

[trailer via ThePlaylist]