"ANYONE KNOW THIS CHICK'S NUMBER?"

After the jump you can watch the trailer for Las Palmas, which won the award for Best Short Film at the Gothenberg Film Festival.  Directed by Johannes Nyholms, it features his one-year-old daughter, Helmi, getting “drunk” and trashing a bar.  Apparently, it’s already been seen by 400,000 people.  I’m sorry for being late to the party, but I’m glad I still got in, because there’s drunk babies here and that rules.  Seriously, watch it.  I laughed a lot, and I hate babies worse than cancer.

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This is the trailer for Babies, a documentary about, you guessed it, babies.

Simultaneously follows four babies around the world — from birth to first steps. The children are, respectively, in order of on-screen introduction: Ponijao, who lives with her family near Opuwo, Namibia; Bayarjargal, who resides with his family in Mongolia, near Bayanchandmani; Mari, who lives with her family in Tokyo, Japan; and Hattie, who resides with her family in the United States, in San Francisco. [Yahoo]

I’m not that into babies, because as Patton Oswalt says, they’re just miniature shirtless humans wearing bags of crap around their waists.  But if you called this Puppies, I’d already have a ticket.  I mean just look at this sh-t:

I’d buy whatever he was selling, even if it was baby poison. Read the rest of this entry »

Jennifer Aniston and Owen Wilson are set to star in a film adaptation of Marley & Me, a book about a couple that get a lab puppy to prepare themselves for parenthood.  Scott Frank (Minority Report, Out of Sight) is working on the script, with David Frankel (The Devil Wears Prada) on to direct.

See, I always thought the Hollywood thing to do was to adopt a third world ethnic-type baby to prepare for parenthood. That way if you fuck it up, you can just yell, "Yeah? Well he’d be sitting on a dirt floor eating flies if it weren’t for me!  And now he’s got an iPod!  AN IPOD!"

You hear that kind of stuff coming from the Jolie-Pitt house all the time.  The More You Know: Adopting an ethnic child is a great way to prepare for having a real baby.

HOLY CRAP, LOOK HOW CUTE THAT LAB PUPPY IS!!  (runs off during momentary distraction)

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