Accoring to Deadline, Hugh Jackman has dropped out of Avon Man.  It’s a shame, because from what we’ve heard, this had the potential to be the finest film of all time.

Story follows men laid off from an auto dealership. One is reluctantly recruited into becoming an Avon salesman, and while the experience is initially emasculating, he uses his charm and good looks to become a top seller. The comedy takes on a “Full Monty” vibe when the car salesman sets out to save his financially strapped family and town by conscripting his buddies into the makeup business to win a regional contest.

I tried to read that out loud, but when I opened my mouth, the only sound that came out was a slide whistle.  Also keep in mind, Jackman dropped out of Avon Man while on the set of Real Steel, the film in which he trains a robot to box.  If his choices seem strange, that’s because his six-year-old daughter’s birthday wish was for him to do only the movies she chose for an entire year, and the wish was sealed with a genie’s kiss.  Can Hugh Jackman win back her love??

Yadda yadda yadda, now he’s getting in shape for Wolverine 2.

Jackman will spend the late fall getting in killer shape to reprise his role as Logan in a sequel to X-Men Origins: Wolverine. That film is being scripted by Christopher McQuarrie [Usual Suspects, Valkyrie] and tells a samurai story set in Japan. There is no director, but Jackman’s move means that Fox is getting the film ready for production next year.

You hear that??? WOLVERINE 2, YOU GUYS!  ….Whoa.  Even the crickets are dismissively wanking.

(Hugh couldn’t believe it was really Suze Orman)

In a high six-figure deal (you’re kidding me, right?), guess which studio (hint: it’s Fox) bought a comedy pitch from Hitch writer Kevin Bisch called Avon Man.  Hugh Jackman is attached to star.

Story follows men laid off from an auto dealership. One is reluctantly recruited into becoming an Avon salesman, and while the experience is initially emasculating, he uses his charm and good looks to become a top seller. The comedy takes on a “Full Monty” vibe when the car salesman sets out to save his financially strapped family and town by conscripting his buddies into the makeup business to win a regional contest. [Variety]

I imagine how this went down was, in the middle of a Fox meeting, someone stood up and shouted, “Hugh Jackman… as an AVON LADY!”  Then confetti fell from the ceiling accompanied by kazoo sounds and monkeys throwing sh*t at each other.