While I doubt this has the potential to become Christian Bale screaming OOOH GOOOD FER YOUUUU or David O. Russell calling Lily Tomlin a c*nt, it is still an on-set argument, and as an immature film blogger, I’m doody-bound to cover it. The principals this time were Precious director Lee Daniels and producer Avi Lerner, who, in addition to producing The Expendables, Drive Angry, and the Conan remake, was exec producer on the the dog-playing-piano classic, Cool Dog, named the best movie of all time by Facts magazine. The two were on the set of their new movie The Paperboy, starring Zack Efron and Nicole Kidman, and while the details of the argument are still sketchy, it appears Daniels accused Lerner of being racist against scuba divers.

It’s hard to hear the entire argument, but at one point Avi says to Lee, “You call him a racist. You know you’re racist too. You always pay attention to that.”
It appears Avi threatened to fire Lee, saying, “I don’t want you to leave, but if you don’t apologize to me and you know you should ….” and then the audio is impossible to understand.
And it seems much of the argument involves money. At the end, Lee taunts Avi, saying, “Need some money, need some money?” Avi says, “We paid the scuba divers a lot.  Shame on you.” It appears from the conversation … the movie is way over the paltry $15 million budget. [TMZ]

One of my favorite things is walking by a couple having a huge argument and having to piece together what it was all about based on one or two out-of-context quotes. If I had walked by this one and all I heard was “We paid the scuba divers a lot. Shame on you,” I think my head would’ve exploded from the possibilities.

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Okay, I admit, at first they were kind of fun, in an isn’t-this-ridiculous sort of way, but now I’m seriously tired of the possible-sequels stories. The latest one involves a possible Expendables sequel (yes, an Expendables sequel), and it was sparked by this quote from producer Avi Lerner via HeyUGuys:

“We all want to do it, we are already working on it and I’m ready to go. Everyone had such a great time making this.”
“We will wait until Monday and see what the (box office) numbers are like but I am pretty confident right now that we will be back and work is already underway (on a sequel). Why not? I know everyone in this would like to do another and I know that I would.”

Dude. No.  Me and Chodin have a great time holding hands while we sh*t too, that doesn’t mean people want to watch us do it.  It’s a throwback movie.  You get one. I hope it’s fantastic.  I hope it reminds us all of an awesome 80s action movie.  But no one wants a sequel.  A throwback movie is like a cover band.  People will come to the shows, girls might even show their t*ts, but no one wants to see a tribute band to your cover band.  A sequel?  Are you serious?  Stallone will be 176 years old by then.

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For a guy who hasn’t made a feature since Rush Hour 3, Brett Ratner’s name sure gets attached to a lot of projects. My sense is that he just shows up, collects a paycheck for a while, and then leaves when the nachos run out.  The latest project for which he’s reportedly “in talks” is Hercules.  I just hope they’ll treat it with all the respect they showed Conan, by which I mean hire a guy from a Baywatch spinoff to star.

Mustard my corn dog, LA Times:

Ratner is in talks to direct Lerner’s long-developed tale of the mythological god (Hercules to the Romans, Heracles to the Greeks). The producer has been developing the movie for more than three years, with the project gaining new momentum of late, though it’s still in the development stage. Little is known about the specifics of the new version, though it’s expected to bring Lerner’s classic action ethos to the larger-than-life character.

If this project ever happens (which it won’t), I guaran-godd*mn-tee you they will try to get Taylor Lautner to star. They should just re-release the original from 1970 in which Arnold Schwarzenegger fights a bear.  This is one of my favorite clips of all time:

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Last week The Hollywood Reporter was reporting that Brett Ratner was all but confirmed to direct a remake of Conan the Barbarian.  According to the LA Times, that may just have been wishful thinking on the part of the producer.  And, yes, that means there’s a producer out there actually wishing for Brett Ratner.  Tomorrow it may rain cats while I wear shoes on my hands.

One of Hollywood’s most persuasive salesman, [Conan producer Avi] Lerner told me this morning that Ratner was the perfect director. “He has the passion and feeling for this project–he even wrote a story about Conan when he was 10 years old,” Lerner explained. “He understands the character, he analyzed the script really well. He knows how to make this a really big movie. I like his childlike enthusiasm–he almost sees these movies as wonderful toys. What can I say, he’s a nice, likable Jewish boy.”

Unfortunately, his childlike enthusiasm is really just a side effect of having the mind of a child.

But is Ratner actually committed to doing the film? In two words: Not really. When I called him today, he sounded somewhat agitated, unhappy that news of his negotiations with Lerner had surfaced, especially since he is extremely close to getting a green light from Paramount to make “Beverly Hills Cop 4.” “Let me make this very clear,” he told me. “I am not doing ‘Conan’ now. This is totally premature. For now, ‘Conan’ is only a development deal. I have a deal at Paramount and I’m doing ‘Beverly Hills Cop’ first, no matter what. Avi shouldn’t be telling you or anyone else in the press what I’m doing.”

Oh snap!  Jew fight! Jew fight! Jew fight! Read the rest of this entry »