Wait, you get a discount for crotchless?  I would think that’d cost extra.  How else you going to get a tail or a ponytail in there?  Sub-comment: What do I take from all these crotch-damaged Na’vi costumes?  Trannies love Avatar.  Sub-comment 2: Crotchless pants 15% off?  Hmm, not ideal, but I can work with it.

MORNING LINKS

• Looking For The Perfect Gadget Gift? |Uproxx|

• Burnsy asks: Can You Trust Credit Cards This Time? |UproxxNews|

• Boy gets detention for farting on school bus. The absolute best part of this story is that it made the local news. |NYCBarstoolsports|

• This is the greatest gif since the Snooki Punch, and it involves choke-’bating. |WarmingGlow|

• I’ve always thought Randy Moss’s bad rep was a bit undeserved, but this latest story has all but changed my mind. |KissingSuzyKolber|

• Sexy tranny wins Scrabble championship. |GammaSquad|

• Lingerie football player weighs in on the QB touching her butt in a very special episode of “The Internet.” |Clutch|

• Amazing new meme: Puff Dog. |Buzzfeed|

• Manny Pacquiao Sings ‘Imagine’ With will Ferrell on ‘Jimmy Kimmel Live’ |BroBible|

• Interesting Facts about the Air Sex Championships |SmokingJacket|

• In honor of Prop 19 passing not passing, the best stoners in movie history. |NextMovie|

• Five douchebags you’ll encounter while voting. Ha, I voted by mail. |HolyTaco|

• The 11 Most Awesome Bill Murray Moments in Ghostbusters |KoldcastTV|

• Nine aliens ju don’ wanna foke weeth, ése. |ScreenJunkies|

• The 20 most successful film franchises of all time. |NERDS!|

• The Star Wars Trilogy Retold Through Paper. |UnrealityMag|

FilmDrunk on Facebook. FilmDrunk on Twitter. The Frotcast on iTunes. Comments of the week

SITE POLL: Question for the Drunkards: What were the best and worst Halloween costumes you saw this year? Email us at frotcast@gmail.com.

If you’re James Cameron, how do you top the highest-grossing movie of all time?  You don’t, you just try to make the same thing over again a couple times.  You’d think a guy who made f-you money last year (not to mention f-me, f-your sister, and f any high-priced call girl or Russian peasant I damn well please money) would be able to do what he wants, and James Cameron can, but for whatever reason, he’s always had a bit of a JRR Tolkien bug up his ass about Avatar.  He doesn’t just want to make the movie, he wants to turn it into a trilogy, write the novelizations, invent the language, and draw up an entirely new font for the subtitles to be 3D-projected in.  That is to say, it seems to be a creative decision and not a business decision.  Either that, or hunting human beings for sport is a lot more expensive than we once thought.  First you have to pay off the families, then there’s bribes to the government, the kind of maids that don’t ask questions, then there’s the yacht and the guns and the guys who make booby traps, not to mention the insurance — it never ends!

James Cameron has locked in a  deal with Fox to make Avatar 2 and 3, due in theaters December 2014 and December 2015 respectively.

Said the director in a statement, “Our goal is to meet and exceed the global audience’s expectations for the richness of AVATAR’s visual world and the power of the storytelling. In the second and third films, which will be self contained stories that also fulfill a greater story arc, we will not back off the throttle of AVATAR’s visual and emotional horsepower, and will continue to explore its themes and characters, which touched the hearts of audiences in all cultures around the world.” [HollywoodReporter]

Whoa, I know she died in the first film, but did anyone else just read that as, “Michelle Rodriguez is back, baby!”?   In any case, shrewd business man that I am, I’ve already begun buying stock in the Papyrus font company.

James Cameron took time out of his busy schedule eating Komodo-dragon-egg sushi off the breasts of his new Ukranian wife-slaves on his yacht recently to drop by G4′s Attack of the Show to show off the Cameron-Pace 3D camera rig with which he shot Avatar.  Captain America director Joe Johnston recently complained that the rig was too unwieldy, which is why he chose to post-convert rather than shoot in 3D, but the rig doesn’t seem that bad. Anyway, Cameron shared some of the camera’s tech specs with AOTS host Captain Whathisface, like how it’s made from Unicorn Jizz and pure kryptonite.  Yep, that’s what I heard.

This camera is called a mini beam splitter rig and is set up inverted to be hand-held.

This rig was specifically created for the movie from two Sony cameras.

Unlike most 3D cameras, the Pace doesn’t use two side by side cameras for 3D effects.

Instead, it uses two cameras on the top and bottom to recreate how the 3D space will look on screen.

This technology is known as “fusion 3D.”

The beam splitter allows the two lenses to merge inside each other as the top camera can move side to side to change the interocular distance or change angles to control the convergence. [to control the "sweet spot" of the 3D image]

It’s a silent and fast 9 axis motion control system.

The rig weighs 28 lbs.

The two cameras must be finely calibrated in order to be doing the same thing at the exact same time.

[as for how much it costs, Cameron says, "Think a couple of Ferraris," meanwhile probably thinking, "Like the couple of Ferraris I store in my servant's quarters.] [via G4]

Cameron mentions that he did all the hand-held camera work on Avatar himself, and Captain Whatshisface calls him a hero, saying, “I have a new deal of respect for you, sir, because I could not hold that thing for 15 seconds.”  Really, dude?  You just said the thing weighed 28 pounds.  You can’t hold 28 pounds for 15 seconds?  Your mom has dildos that weigh more than that.  If the Russians ever invade, we’ll have to issue this guy a Nerf crotch bat and super-absorbent hankie to dry his girl tears.

Related: No Avatar sequel until at least 2014.  (*sad Pocahontas cat monkey*)

Back when Fox was promoting the release of Avatar, I always just assumed the whole James-Cameron-had-to-wait-for-the-technology-to-catch-up part of the story was just another one of those mostly-bullsh*t soundbites that isn’t literally true but gets repeated so often that it becomes part of the mythology (you know, like, say, “he’s not just creating a movie, he’s creating a whole universe.”).  But here’s a Bathroom Reader story from 1999 that seems to corroborate, listing Avatar as a movie project that ended up being scrapped because it was too expensive.

And that, folks, is why James Cameron can afford to cruise around international waters on his opulently appointed yacht with only the finest European prostitutes, hunting lesser men for sport. Because the man has a little thing called “vision.”

[via UnrealityMag]

According to this graph, M. Night Shyamalan’s next film will have the first ever negative Rotten Tomatoes score.  This is math, DO NOT DISPUTE IT. [via Reddit, right-click and select "view image" for bigger version]

DAILY CIRCLE JERK

• Geektress is sending comic-book care packages to soldiers, which is a pretty cool idea, so go there an donate or else you are a horrible person.  A horrible, freedom-hating, freeloading communo-fascist. |Geektress|
• Robopanda brings the heat again with 8 inexpensive things repurposed for something awesome. |Uproxx|
• Robot jazz drummer?  Robot jazz drummer. |GammaSquad|
• Ladies love being touched by Ichiro. It’s like he’s part octopus or something. |WithLeather|
• The inner monologue of a vuvuzela vendor on the last day of the World Cup. |HolyTaco|
• The 7 types of guys that ruin pick-up sports. |Guyism|
• Internet sex moves, volume 2. |CollegeHumor|
• A review of the Droid X.  The X stands for XXXXTREEEME TEXTING.  |G4|
• Hot woman vs. horny, boxing kangaroo.  Weird, that was the theme of my senior prom. |GorillaMask|
• Comic Con 2010: the girls of Sucker Punch. |UGO|
• Box Office sweet spot: your favorite directors aren’t very popular. |Pajiba|
• Some women actually do switch sexual orientation, reports Girls Gone Wild magazine. |Asylum|
• An interview with JB Smoove |ScreenJunkies|

And finally, Burnsy sent me these pictures of a stripper in Avatar body paint.  After that, he gave me some wine and asked me how I felt “down there.”