Bloody-disgusting reports:

Universal Pictures is looking to restart Anne Rice’s The Vampire Chronicles, which tells the tale of the vampire Lestat Du [sic] Lioncort (through his narration), a nobleman-turned-vampire in the late 18th century. [...]

We have confirmed this afternoon that ROBERT DOWNEY JR. is in close talks to play the vampire Lestat in Universal Pictures’ The Vampire Chronicles, a newly rebooted franchise based on Anne Rice’s popular novels.

No way.  Robert Downey, Jr. as a dandy French vampire?  I can just imagine the meeting at Universal:

“Vampires are so hot right now.”
“We haven’t turned every Anne Rice napkin-scribble into a movie yet have we?”
“If we call it a reboot we can use any book we want.”
“Great!  Now who can play a femmy, blond, 18th century French nobleman and also deliver this pretentious emo dialogue without a hint of sarcasm or exasperation?”
“I’ve got it!  Robert.  Downey.  Junior.”
“Magnificent.  Make it happen.  Now let’s bring the meeting to a close, shall we?  Ramone!  Bring in the biscuit.”

~ robopanda