Alison Stevenson has seen a lot of indie movies lately, and she’s sick to death of certain aspects of the ever-popular “quirky girl” character. As a real-life “quirky girl,” I thought Alison would be a perfect person to– ouch, ow, oh God, she’s hitting me! Her knuckles are so sharp! Okay, I’m sorry, I take back the quirky thing. Anyway, back to Alison.

I recently watched the new Noah Baumbach film, Frances Ha. There were a lot of things that I liked about it, but more things that annoyed the crap out of me. To me, the film was basically a long episode of Girls, but for some reason Adam wears a fedora. Not only does he wear a fedora, but he still manages to get laid—the f*ck? Anyways, what’s really pissing me off about this film, and also every other indie production with a “quirky” female lead, is how predictable these women become. The manic pixie dream girl is a tired character that has officially been done to death. As much as these women might deny that this is what they’re embodying, it totally is what they’re embodying. So with that being said, I give you some examples of the crap I’m sick of, and even offer some extremely clever alternatives because I am thoughtful like that. Read the rest of this entry »

Yeah so Zach Braff is causing some sort of outrage because he got a Kickstarter to fund his film, which is now at $1.8 million and counting. I get the anger, but let’s face it, this is going to keep happening. Independent filmmakers, has-been celebrities, and artistically stubborn rich people are all taking the hint. Get ready for an onslaught of industry connected wealthy people taking advantage of folks less well off than them. I managed to find six already from really well-known stars and directors! They make some interesting pleas. Check it out: Read the rest of this entry »

FilmDrunk readers, we’re usually pretty factual around here, so I hope you’ll enjoy this break from reading the news. It’s time to read some exquisite literature I have written for you. Please enjoy semi-erotic fan fiction about my two favorite Hollywood hunks, Keanu Reeves and Matthew McConaughey. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll be super horned up! Trust me, you’ll want to read this to the end.

George Lucas on the phone with me.

Movie Ideas For Hollywood To Make Movies With

As you might already know, I drink a lot of alcohol and have a lot of brilliant ideas while doing so. Most of the ideas are for movies I am going to write and/or pitch to fancy executives in Hollywoodland. I write my ideas down on napkins, coasters, and one time on a leaf. I figured I’d share them, and even elaborate on some of them. I also found cool posters for the films on Shutterstock. Read on if you are interested in reading on.

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Inviting someone over to watch a movie with you is pretty much universal code for “let’s have sex, but pretend that was not the intention for tonight so we don’t feel so morally perverse.” Now, some of you might not put a lot of thought into the movie you’re going to play for you and your date, but I am here to tell you that it matters. The film you choose is very important in setting the mood, and in many cases is also a valid expression of who you are, and what kind of lover you will be. Through much trial and error I have figured out the perfect films to play before the long long night of lovemaking.

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