Box Office: Pacific Rim trounced by Adam Sandler and the deer-piss crew

Good thing we had more important news to worry about this weekend than movie numbers, because those were pretty disheartening. As many already suspected, Grown Ups 2 came in ahead of Pacific Rim (our review), $42.5 to $38.3 million, proving yet again that internet hype doesn’t have much of an effect on Charlie Cheesesnack and his family in West Fumblefart. At $28 mil on a $250 mil budget we called Lone Ranger a bomb, so with $38 mil on a $190 mil budget, Pacific Rim isn’t quite that, but it still would’ve made a great bomb pick in our Fantasy Summer Box Office game. Only an idiot like me would make it a non-bomb pick. Oops.

One of the silver linings of the week is that Grown Ups 2 received a pretty poor B cinemascore, which means that even people who thought Grown Ups 2 looked high-larious still thought the finished product was kind of lame. Which is hilarious to me, because I imagine a restaurant patron going, “Yo, this shit sandwich doesn’t even look like the picture.”

Grown Ups and Pacific Rim were actually number two and three this week behind Despicable Me 2, which kept the party going in its second week of release, taking in $44.7 million.

Based on its current trajectory, [Despicable Me 2] should wind up being the Summer’s second-highest-grossing movie with around $350 million. [BoxOfficeMojo]

Amazingly, according to the official numbers, Despicable Me 2 actually cost less than Grown Ups 2 to make, $76 million to $80 million. Grown Ups 2‘s $80 million budget is so baffling, there must’ve been a scene where Kevin James farts to death a Godzilla that they didn’t put in the trailer. How does that movie cost $80 million?!? I just like to imagine the producer looking over the numbers, shouting “Sandler, are you crazy?! This budget calls for real farts! The accountants will never go for it, can’t you just use one-third scale models like Jim Carrey’s penguin movie??!”

“NEVER. THE FARTS MUST BE REAL AND FULL SIZED! I HAVE A LITTLE SOMETHING CALLED ARTISTIC INTEGRITY!”

Meanwhile, if you need a little pick me up on the same weekend that saw George Zimmerman go free, the cute kid from Glee die, and a Happy Madison turd become a box office smash, I could point out that The Lone Ranger plummeted almost 62 percent from its already disappointing opening weekend, and probably won’t even get to $100 million domestically, on a $250 million budget. It’s not doing great internationally either. So hey, at least there’s that. Oh schadenfreude, what would we do without you?

1. Despicable Me 2 (Universal) – $44,754,000 ($229,237,000)

2. Grown Ups 2 (Sony) – $42,500,000

3. Pacific Rim (Warner Bros.) – $38,300,000

4. The Heat (Fox) – $14,000,000

5. The Lone Ranger (Buena Vista) – $11,140,000 ($71,101,000)

6. Monsters University (Buena Vista) – $10,621,000 ($237,760,000)

7. World War Z (Paramount) – $9,430,000 ($177,087,000)

8. White House Down (Sony) – $6,150,000 ($62,963,000)

9. Kevin Hat: Let Me Explain (Lionsgate) – $5,000,000 ($26,378,000)

10. Man Of Steel (Warner Bros.) – $4,825,000 ($280,995,000) [Indiewire – domestic numbers, based on early estimates]

Fantasy Summer Box Office Standings

Look at me, putting all my hopes in the internet-hype basket like a god damn amateur. That decision probably cost me the game, unless Wolverine magically earns $100 million the first weekend out. (Which it won’t). Laremy’s got this all but locked up.

Laremy (First overall pick)

1. Iron Man 3 – $175.3

2. Man of Steel $117 million / $225 million budget = 52%, 100 minus 52 = 48.

3. Epic: 33.5

4. Lone Ranger: 29.4

Total: 286.2

Vince (2nd pick):

1. 6 Fast 6 Furious: 97.4

2. Pacific Rim: 38.3

3. The Wolverine

4. We are the Millers (Bomb)

Total: 135.7

Bret (3rd pick)

1. Star Trek 2: 71

2. Despicable Me 2: 82.5

3. Lone Ranger (Bomb): 29m on a 250m budget = 12%, 100 – 12 = 88.

4. After Earth: 27

Total: 268.5

Brendan (4th pick)

1. Man of Steel: 113

2. Hangover 3: 41.7

3. The Internship: 18.1

4. The Great Gatsby (Bomb): $51 million on a $105 million budget, which equals 49 percent of budget, subtracted from 100 is 51.

Total: 224

Ben (5th):

1. Monsters University: 82

2. Planes

3. World War Z: 66

4. World War Z (Bomb): $66 million on a $190 million budget, equals 34.7 percent of budget, 100 minus 35 equals 65.

Total: 213

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