I cropped this new still from Nymphomaniac and put the full version after the jump, because I’m honestly not sure if it counts as NSFW or not (Is that a nipple or hair? You decide). In any case, you may remember that noted Hitler enthusiast Lars Von Trier has made a sexy art movie starring Charlotte Gainsbourg, which is reportedly going to show full-on dongs going in (albeit with the actors digitally grafted onto their full-penetration performing body doubles). Man, I would’ve enjoyed The Proposal so much more if they’d used that effect.
Nympho also stars Shia LaBeouf, a part he won by sending Von Trier sex tapes he made with his girlfriend, and Von Trier’s been releasing chapters of the film online every month. The latest is called “Jerome,” and it went to Vulture. It begins “Love is just lust with jealousy added.” Brings new meaning to the phrase “I love you too, grandma!” doesn’t it.
This month, Von Trier has kindly provided Vulture with the exclusive tease for the movie’s second chapter, “Jerôme,” in which Joe [Gainsbourg] recalls her encounter with a young man played by Shia LaBeouf. You can check out the NSFW still from the chapter’s sex scene — featuring LaBeouf and actress Stacy Martin as the younger Joe.
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For more on Nymphomaniac, keep an eye on the film’s official site: Footage from this chapter will be debuting tomorrow morning at 7 a.m. EST. As for the movie itself, expect a release from Magnolia Pictures in early 2014. [Vulture]
For those of you disgusted at the very mention of “sex” and “Shia LaBeouf” in the same sentence, hey, think of the bright side. Maybe a talking fox will chew his wiener off, or Joe’s mentally challenged brother will burst in the room and beat him to death with his prosthetic leg mid-coitus. I mean, we are talking Lars Von Trier here.
So what do you think it’s supposed to be? Parentheses? A vulva emoticon? The cervix? All I know is, I really need to visit Denmark.