Yesterday I posted a video mash-up of R.I.P.D. and Men in Black showing that they’re basically the same movie, and probably the most surprising thing about the video for most people was the fact that R.I.P.D. is the name of a movie opening this weekend. In another bit of unsurprising news, tracking firms report that the $130-million-budgeted R.I.P.D. is headed for a big bomb when it goes up against Turbo, The Conjuring, and Red 2 this weekend. Take these tracking numbers with a grain of salt, but the tracking folks were right about Grown Ups beating Pacific Rim.
From the LA Times’ story R.I.P.D. looks DOA at the box office (a key tenet of AP style is that you have to use acronym puns on all acronym titles):
“R.I.P.D. is scoring the lowest out of any summer movie we’ve seen,” said consumer polling firm Piedmont Media Research president, Joshua Lynn. “It’s easily shaping up to be the big summer bomb.”
Entering a crowded multiplex this weekend — where the film will face off against the ensemble action caper “Red 2,” the animated kid flick “Turbo” and the modestly budgeted horror movie “The Conjuring” — audience tracking surveys show that “R.I.P.D.” could gross as little as $17 million in its opening weekend, likely the worst among the four new films in release.
To add insult to injury, this means R.I.P.D. director Robert Schwenke, who directed Red, is going to lose to the sequel to his own movie.
Crap, does this mean Bill Simmons gets to be right in his “Ryan Reynolds isn’t a movie star” article? I mean, R.I.P.D.’s failure could have something to do with the fact that it’s been in development since 1999, when the concept seemed much more fresh, had no fewer than five credited writers (not counting the uncredited ones), and a title that sounds like a Bodman fragrance, but FINE, Simmons, blame it on the adorable Canadian fellow with the washboard abs and charming manner. Poor, Ryan Reynolds, I hope God makes this even out somehow. Maybe by making him rich, famous, and handsome and letting him bang hot blondes for the rest of his life or something.
Worse agent: Ryan Reynolds’ or Clive Owen’s? Discuss.