Another day, another person with a secret porn past. As Gawker reported last night, the recently-crowned Miss Delaware Teen USA, Melissa M. King, resigned after a video surfaced on GirlsdoPorn.com (NSFW, duh) that appears to show someone who looks a lot like King. The girl in the video says she turned 18 three months earlier and that she needs the money, just prior doing the kind of stuff people usually do in porno (pretty tame for XXX, actually, the guy even wears a condom. not that I’ve watched.). King has so far denied that the girl in the porn is her, but asking us to believe that she’s resigning because a girl in a porno just reeeally looks like her would require a Shyamalan-esque leap in logic.

In a phone interview with The News Journal on Monday, King said she was aware of the video, but denied appearing in it.
“Absolutely not,” she said. “It is not.”
Of the porn site’s claim [that the girl is her], she said: “There are comments saying this; however, it’s not comments that are true.”
Asked if the woman in the video is just someone who closely resembles her, King said, “Um, I’d rather not be talking right now, but yeah.” [DelawareOnline]

A very pageant-girl doublespeak answer. “Yes, you are correct in saying that there are comments saying this, however those are comments that are not true. So in a sense, everyone’s right. Now, let’s talk about the bigger issues, like childhood hunger.”

I always feel a little bad reporting stories like this. Of course it’s titillating, because the only thing hotter than finding out a “barely legal” porn girl is actually barely legal is knowing that a porn girl is a real person, who wears socks and eats food and has normal, wholesome hobbies like regular peoples (and I don’t mean pageantry, which is clearly perverse). I promise, if a stripper came out in a hoodie and lounging-around clothes instead of the normal stripper gear, she would absolutely clean up. That said, a big part of my enjoyment of porn is the fantasy that, for the girl in the video, the whole having-sex-on-camera thing is perfectly natural. I engage in a type of magical where I assume that me and the porno are actually helping this nice young lady find this judgment-free arena, away from the prying eyes and tutting fingers of our evil puritanical society, where she can finally be herself. Which of course involves her sharing her most intimate sexy times and willing bukakke face for our enjoyment. A story like this, where the girl characterizes the whole escapade as this big mistake that she made one time that she’s going to regret for years to come sort of punctures that bubble.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, I have the most conflicted boner right now. On a serious note, I wish her all the best. People who judge the performers in the porn we all watch are the worst kind of hypocrites.