Do I still need to list all the ways in which New Zealand has become a giant Lord of the Rings gift shop? Hobbit money. Hobbit airplane safety videos. Hobbit sculptures in the airport. Hobbit passport stamps. And things really reached a crescendo this week as The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey had its premiere in Wellington. How bad was it? Well, this guy did an entire summer weather forecast in Sindarin, one of the Elvish languages generally spoken between elves and- oh God I just wedgied myself it burns. You guys know there are going to be two more of these movies still, right? It’s like an entire country full of dorky, over-eager dads! New Zealand’s official motto: “Aw, dad! You’re embarrassing me!”
The way he nods at his cue because they cut to him too early… it’s just… it’s perfect in every way. He’s so into it! This is the most fun he’s ever had! And they spend more than half the 90-second video congratulating each other for it! “Virry virry imprissuve, moight! The way you woah thet wug loike thet… And heow dud you evah lirn sich good Ilvush? Dud they teach ut un schull?”
I imagine going to school in New Zealand is like being in a classroom full of Butterses from South Park, with everyone laughing and high-fiving because they get to finger paint. It’s the happiest place on Earth! Like a little boy who’s lived in a closet for ten years that suddenly got handed a slinky!
It is my dream to go to New Zealand and write a book about the Hobbit fever sweeping the sleepy nation. I will finance the whole trip by bartering with locals in pogs and slap bracelets.
[thanks to Brandon for the tip]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/McFlurry-Sousaphone-baby-names-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/03/New-Zealand-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/video-unconcious-deer-wakes-up-in-trunk-of-michigan-mans-car-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/your-mid-week-guide-to-dvd-and-streaming-zero-dark-thirty-an-unexpected-journey-filmdrunk-150x150.jpg)
Their kung fu is obviously stronger than mine.
/bows down
I love that England is just sighing and letting these people take the mythology a famous writer intended for them. “Let dem twat LARPahs ‘ave et Tawmmy”
In related news, the Irish Republican Army has announced Game of Thrones Week will be celebrated in Belfast during the last week of March leading up to the season 3 premiere.
A gay Maori dude getting all nerded up on Lord of the Rings. I have seen everything.
Don’t you remember when The King’s Speech was released and all of the BBC newsreaders were stuttering and stammering as a tribute during their broadcasts? Damned annoying it was.
Also, that Boston weathergirl who screamed and pulled the covers over her head every time there were thunderstorms in the forecast? Yep…homage to Ted.
Weird. Scotland was very, very mellow after Trainspotting came out.
For the first time in the history of the world?
We think not screamed thousands of wanna-be hobbits from their parents’ basement.
All I know is that this guy bares a striking resemblence to actors in WoW themed adult movies. Of which I have only academic knowledge.
I’d like to think if the first Rings trilogy bombed, they’d be basing all their tourism around Heavenly Creatures. “Come to wonderful New Zealand! Have a forbidden lesbian affair and then cave in her mom’s skull!”
The worst bit is, he wore that to the premiere of the film. And not the premiere in the main theatre – the ‘second tier’ VIPs (like myself, I’m not ashamed to say) were in a different theatre down the road a bit. So freaking embarrassing.