I was in the middle of writing my Lincoln review when I saw this video, and I immediately dropped everything to write up a Friday Free For All post around it. It’s that good. Rebecca Black’s “Friday” producer at Ark Music Factory in LA has a new protegé, by the name of Nicole Westbrook. Now, I’m one of those people who makes no apologies for loving “Friday” unironically. It’s catchy! If you don’t think “Friday” is a better song than “Tik Tok” or “Moves Like Jagger” you are a legitimate moron with cow pies for ears. Anyway, Ark’s Patrice Wilson is back, with a song about Thanksgiving, performed by Nicole Westbrook, and it is nothing short of a goddamned masterpiece. Patrice Wilson is this guy, by the way:
Just a black dude in a turkey costume singing songs to a bunch of rich white kids while they eat, nothing weird about that. If the black guy wasn’t the producer I’d swear this was the most racist thing ever. “Hey, you know what’d be cool? If I showed up to some white kids’ house dressed like a turkey and ate all their ribs.”
And you’ll be glad to know that the man who once wrote “yesterday is Thursday, today it is Friday, tomorrow it is Saturday and Sunday comes afterwards” has NOT LOST his magic with the word:
- December was Chistmas. January was New Year’s. April was Easter. And the 4th of July, but NOW IT’S THANKSGIVING!
- With the turkey AY! Mashed potatoes AY!
- Can’t be hateful/gotta be grateful/mashed potatoes on my table…
- I got ribs/smellin up my neighbor’s cribs
A Rebecca Black-esque song about food? OH MY GOD, SOMEONE’S INVADED MY WHEELHOUSE! THEY TOOK EVERYTHING!
My favorite moment of the video is when this kid shows up to Nicole Westbrook’s house, and he’s all like, “Yo, what up, girl, I brought you some food or whateva, wanna get durrrty?”
And then Nicole Westbrook is all, “Nah, sorry, playa, I got a man. He’s 35 and he knows how to work a grill.”
YOU NASTY, BRIAN! NO ONE INVITED YOU ANYWAY!
But in all seriousness, I love this. You know why? Silly and fake and weird as it is, it’s a lot nicer to see a bunch of kids looking all awkward and being excited to eat mashed potatoes than it is to see them carefully styled and bragging about their goddamned ‘swag.’ Ark Music Factory for life.
Man, is anyone else suddenly really hungry for ribs?
[hat tip: Jezebel]
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WOULD HIT IT! The ribs that is, I would totally hit those. Um…the pork ribs, to be clear, not saying I would hit that little girl’s ribs. I mean I would totally hit that too, but I wasn’t saying that with my original statement all in caps.
But, but, but … Thanksgiving was the 28th LAST YEAR! This can’t be new. Why did they sit on this masterpiece for so long?!?!?!?!?
Actually, it’s the 28th next year. You can just barely see the 2013 in the first few seconds of the video. (I hate myself for paying so much attention)
I assume made this video none of them had a current year calendar so they went to the mall where the Calendar stands have been up for a month now and bought a new one which would be next years.
Oops, nevermind. /flagellates
Crazy Americans. Thanksgiving was a month ago.
Why is all the focus on dates … Oh MY God … he is the real life Calender Man
I’d like to see a cameo by the bro from the Golden Corral commercial who says, “I’m a rib guy and Golden Corral is my ribs place.”
No pumpkin pie up in this bitch?!
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It’s the Rainmaker! RUN KIDS RUN!
He’ll make you pop! HEY
On Thanksgiving! HEY
Make your head pop-op-op, on Thanksgivvving!
I am aware that trying to make a serious analysis of this thing is besides the point, but I cant help but notice how similar the structure of this song is to Friday’s.
The lyrics, the “we, we, we”, it’s all there. The girl is not as annoying but she’s very flat.
“The girl is not as annoying but she’s very flat
Dude…seriously…don’t be so harsh. Give her a few years. Boobs eventually come…with age…or with babies…or due to genetics…or with a doctor’s intervention…but still they come eventually man.
*cough* I believe Sphincter was talking about her singing pitch.
Well, let me rephrase that. I like to believe Sphincter was talking about her singing pitch.
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Well the entire reason this company exists is to give rich JAPs a music video experience for their birthdays so they don’t really go out of their way to make original songs.
“JAPs,” sir? Easter made the list, but I can’t help but notice the omission of Passover and Sukkot.
Boom, Jew-Lawyered.
Tonight on a very special episode of Inappropriately Young Housewives……
Uncle Tom Turkey
+1
+2
his rap name is Young Turkey.
Chris Hansen: Patrice, let me read a transcript of your chat log with Nicole. ‘Hey girl, let me get at ‘dem baby back ribs.’ ‘I’m gon’ stuff dat turkey.’ ‘Lemme hit dem giblets.’
is it just me or does she have cotton balls in her cheeks?
Damn you for making me say this Vince but “Tik Tok” and “Moves Like Jagger” – as loathsome as they are – are clearly better songs than “Friday.” The “catchy” category is a wash so production alone wins. Plus both songs have an inexplicable Jagger reference and I don’t remember a single one in “Friday.” Let’s see, yesterday was Thursday, tomorrow is Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards…nope, “Friday” is Jaggerless.
Teenage girl in kitchen where she belongs: check.
Adult black guy lurking in turkey neck penis costume: check.
Sure, okay.
Giblets with Attitude.
From now on I’m going to all family gatherings dressed in an animal suit that matches the entrée.
Pump Out the Yams.
So. . . how long until religious groups are outraged about the girl singing with a phallic like, brown drumstick?
I went to Lucille’s BBQ after watching this. And it was all the more delicious.
HOW DID DREW MAGARY TRANSFORM HIMSELF INTO A 13 YEAR OLD FOR THIS??
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Who the fuck eats ribs at Thanksgiving?!
Adult hanging with preteens, no bad intentions there.