With Jerry Bruckheimer producing, The Lone Ranger is all but guaranteed to be sh*tty, since pretty much all of Jerry Bruckheimer's movies since Don Simpson died are sh*tty (Prince of Persia, anyone?), but I admit they've hit on a sure-fire formula for box office gold here: Johnny Depp in a ridiculous costume making silly faces. And Armie The WASPiest WASP Hammer is his perfect foil. After on-set deaths, set-destroying wind storms, and a budget ballooning to more than $250 million, everyone better love it. Luckily for them, as inevitable as death and taxes is the truism, "foreigners love Johnny Depp."
As you'll see, Depp has once again emerged from the costume department looking his usual eccentric self, but don't expect another reprise of his famous "Pirates Of The Caribbean" character. "I'm a long way from Jack Sparrow," Depp says, while Verbinski adds that Tonto "is an odd-shaman, an outcast from his own tribe, who has created his own mystical world." [ThePlaylist]
Yes, a long way from Jack Sparrow. Why, I can't see any similarities at all, save the head scarf, face paint, long hair, braids, leather accessories, wide-eyed look, and feathers in his hair. They could not be more different. Asked to elaborate on his characters' contrasts, Depp paused and mused thoughtfully, "I have a bird on my head in this one."
While some have wondered what the tone of the picture will be, Verbinski's description of the movie conjures up, of all things, "Midnight Run." "It's a dysfunctional buddy movie," he says. "It's two guys who start literally and figuratively handcuffed together who end up on the same mission with completely different world views. They sort of rub off on one another. But they have plenty of disagreements."
Sadly, all of Johnny Depp's arguments will be invalid, because his hair is a bird.
"I'm trying to step out of the box a little. What do you think? I worry it might be a little overdesigned."
I feel like this one needs a Bible quote or something.
Boss, de plaaaaains.
This is what I think of when I think "lone ranger." This kid rules.
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When they said “Johnny, don’t you think you might look a little foolish with that bird on your head?” he replied “My name IS Tonto*, after all.”
*ask a Spanish-speaking friend. Better yet, driver over to East L.A., go up to a bunch of gang-bangin’ cholos and say “Hey, tonto!”
“Is that Tonto?!”
“Thats Chieften Jack Tonto!”
I thought it was Apocolypto 2: The Jews Did It. how did Mel Gibson get that financed?
Bro, Your beak is a human. Wait, whaaaaat! My Halloween is a Christmas. And my pizza is a pot roast. — On the next episode of Revolution.
2012 Depp : Armie Hammer :: Gary Farmer : 1995 Depp
I’m assuming they hired Armie Hammer to play the Lone Ranger because everyone looks ethnic next to the WASP King.
Is Depp 5″5??
No one is going to call racism for the white face Depp is sporting?
No but I’m calling it when he asks, “But why is the rum gone?”
Also, if this doesn’t make a bazillion dollars and spawn several Tonto-centric sequels, I will eat my hat.
My hat is a chicken, so it’s cool.
Boots, I hope I can call you Boots, we’ve only known each other via the interwebs for a couple of years now, which in interwebs terms means we’re Best Forced Friends or some such thing, but since we’re BFF, I think it’s my place to say that you cannot just eat a chicken hat due to a dare.
Seriously, have you cooked the chicken? You know you can’t have chicken raw like you can beef right?
I mean people are dining on beef curtains raw all the time, you never see them doing that with chicken lips do you? Do you? No, I didn’t think so. You gotta think before you leap Boots, think before you leap.
mexicooo…
And now for something completely different.
Pic 4 needs a coyote howling watermark. Also, my grandfather would wear it as a shirt.
In that last pic I feel sorry for Blueshirt Jones and Necktie McGee in the back there. At least Beck Jr. has all that swag working for him, those other two just look stupid.
I’m a member of the Comanche tribe and a few months back they had an adoption ceremony for him and he is now an “honorary” member of the Comanche’s. It’s pretty obvious that it was done to counter the shit storm of racists accusations that will happen with the movie comes out.
I hope your tribe got a couple more casino permits or something else worthwhile for their trouble.
Johnny borrowed that bird from Helena Bonham-Carter’s hair and won’t give it back until Tim Burton’s next movie.
This looks like Michael Bay made a sequel to Dead Man. Don’t wash the Ferrari Johnny, its a trap!
I just can’t wait to hear all the totaly not stereotypical comments he’ll make about how much he loves
rumfirewater.Some thoughts: If the Lone Ranger has a badge, why does he need a mask? A badge is a mark of legitimacy, a mask is the opposite. And at this point I’m gonna take the easy layup
…”Tonto? You are without a doubt the worst shaman I’ve ever heard of.” And so forth.
Legit thought this was a photoshop using a picture of Jack Sparrow.
“They sort of rub off on one another.”
Wait… what kind of movie is this?
So Tonto is a hipster-shaman?