If you think this guy’s ‘stache is awesome, wait until you see his super slow-motion, minute-long death sequence. You’ll be interested to know that a full 60 seconds is actually a really long time to writhe around in agony. Apparently the scene comes from the 1973 Turkish exploitation film, Kareteci Kız, which translates to Karate Girl, which is also a nickname for my penis. Anyway, check it out, it’s fantastic. The scene, I mean, not my penis.
How does it compare to my all-time favorite death scene, from Brian DePalma’s The Fury?
You can tell he’s dead from the seven explosions.
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No slow motion effects were used here. This scene just shows Suileman Attaturk’s depth and ability which later won him an Ottoman.
Aaron Sorkin calls my penis Internet Girl. Which is hurtful, but he also says that it’s really quite something, and that it is never, ever sick at sea.
The Wachowski Post-Heteronormative Paradigm calls my penis ‘Hai Karate for Men.’
@2nd vid. –checks pulse, sadly shakes head–
Looks like the ‘stache waxed wroth.
Yeaaah.
The Hunger Games totally ripped off TurkStache for FutureBeard.
Wait, that was Hillary Swank?
I bet he shot his foot when he fired the gun into the ground.
For some reason, it feels like Turd Ferguson must have directed this. “But see, when I slow it down it becomes painfully obvious, as opposed to regularly obvious that he’s holding the blood in his hand. Should we maybe cut it quicker to obscure the…”
“Hey [chews gum] the kids, they uh, [gum] like the slow motion huh?”
“Do they?”
“Yeah. It’s uh [gum] slow. What kinda gun is that? Revolver? You like the Beatles eh? Help! [gum] I need somebody, Ha! Get it? Help. [gum]”
“Help! isn’t on Revolver, it’s on Help!”
[chews gum for a very long time] “Nah, I don’t think so.”
So this explains why I saw Rowan Atkinson and Joan Van Ark having dinner together at a small cafe in Istanbul in the late 70′s; A nice meal after a long days shooting.
Just asked DJ friend to use audio from this clip to make something special. Will update if results happen.
Karate Dog, Karate Kid, and now Karate Girl? That’s all the excuse I need to post this jam.
“I wish I had something comparable on my demo reel…” Colin Mochrie
Brian DePalma is the shizz. That Turkish dude got served.
This guy still voices Winnie The Pooh and Tigger for the Turkish Disney Channel and also did porn during the big Turkish porn explosion of the 70s.
Seven explosions in the clip from The Fury? I counted way more than that. To quote Big Jim McBob and Billie Sol Hurok, “he blowed up real good.”
In this clip, John Cassavetes provides a graphic illustration of Bender’s characterisation of human beings as “meatbags.”
Are we just going to ignore the mint green turtleneck?