
"I swear to God, if this bitch tells me about her t-shirt business one more time..."
Rumors abound about Carrie Fisher’s past as an incorrigible cocaine addict, mainly because Carrie Fisher won’t shut up about it, in her books, one-woman shows, and impromptu, Home Depot parking performance pieces. But it wasn’t until today (as far as I know) that evidence was presented showing that her utter fienditude was so pervasive that it’d actually been preserved on celluloid. Fisher’s coke nail is clearly visible in this still from Return of the Jedi posted on Reddit. I suppose it could be Photoshopped, but what am I, a lie detector?
Buzzfeed even found another photo of Fisher with a suspiciously long nail:

Maybe it’s just the angle? Huh, and to think, all this time, my adolescence had me convinced that long pinky nails were just something 14-year-old cholo dudes did to show off. It seems like if you have a real addiction, it’s not something you’d want to advertise, like a junkie walking around with rubber tubing still tied to his arm. I mean, is it really that hard to carry a little spoon or some Parliament cigarettes or a decent set of car keys not that I’d know shut up mom I read.
[Buzzfeed]



Does this mean all future Slave Leia cosplay will have to include the long pinkie nail?
Who cares can we just start getting 2/10 Slave Leia’s to actually fit into their metal bikini?
I’d be okay with all future Slave Leia cosplay (done with attractive women) including some actual cocaine.
I guess this could ruin that feeling of innocent childhood whenever I watched Return of the Jedi if George Lucas hadn’t already done so.
Her coke addiction was supposed to be a secret? I thought the all-white pant-suit was kind of a dead giveaway…
Girl, you’ve got a lot of nerve calling Han “scruffy-looking” when you need a manicure so badly.
To be fair she only called him scruffy for a nerf herder, so there is that.
She should’ve pulled a Stevie Nicks on C3P0 and made him blow it up her ass.
Oh great, now Lucas is going to have to release an all new BluRay edition, with a million bucks worth of compositing work to remove the offending nail. It will be known as the “Manicured Edition”.
I’m still waiting for the day Lucas re-edits Mark Hammill’s face in Ep. 4 so that it matches his face in the sequels (Hammill was in a car accident after ANH, and the surgery to fix his face changed the way he looked).
Into the mucus chute, charlie.
When she said she recognized Tarkin’s foul stench on the Death Star, did she actually just mean that she stuck a buttload of cocaine in her nose?
Help me Obi-Wan, you’re my only coke dealer
NICE
Vader? Bubby? I’m your girl *sniff*.
New York’s hottest night club is “Tatooine”. It has everything – droids, hutts, a coked out Carrie Fisher reliving the crushed garbage room scene…
“What did I just see you doing to Luke? What’s that he gave you?”
“Oh, that? That was nothing, Han. He’s…uh…my brother! Yeah, he’s my brother now, we just found out.”
“Jesus fuck, you’re on Cloud City again aren’t you”
Gotta love the ever classic “mom jeans tucked into socks” look in the bottom photo.
And yes I’m totally ignoring the rest of the picture where Carrie Fisher is clearly reverse-snorting coke out of a Gamorreans snout.
Carrie Fisher’s delivery during her Life Day speech from the holiday special is irrefutable evidence that she was a most certainly a llello ventriloquist dummy: [youtu.be]
The 70s were so fucking loose, man. Blowing rails on the set of Star Wars. I really can’t imagine a cooler scenario than that.
I dunno…Close Encounters, Star Wars…..sci-fi cinema needs more hard street drugs.
*ahem* Return of the Jedi came out in 1983.
Ouch! Stop throwing things at me.
*runs back to the relative safety of windowless basement and hot pockets*
So how long before the meme “Carrie Fisher ripped my childhood’s ass with her coke finger.” takes off?
Episode VII: The Prostate Massage From Hell
Anyone notice that the circled fingers are two different fingers on two different hands? Does she do drugs ambidextrously?
You know, i was wondering the exact same thing!