Let the inevitable, merciless ridicule commence in 5... 4... 3...
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Well, well, well, it’s time for everyone’s favorite post of the week, the Frotcast (right? right? …guys?). This week on the Frotcast, we brought back comedian/former Frotcast guest Alison Stevenson (@JustAboutGlad). Alison joins us live in the Frotquarters to add an eyedropper of estrogen to our testosterone stew. We open the show talking about the Dredd 3D press screening I very nearly got banned from, and then I tell the story of the wino at Subway who fed my dog a dollar bill. From there we get into the 10 things overheard at Techcrunch, and all of the nonsensical corporate tech-speak that entails (disrupting the disruptors, anyone?).
Our movie topic of the week is things you always see in movies but never in real life – like taking out bad guys by swiftly, easily breaking their neck with your hand, or workaholics getting their Blackberries smashed by Aaron Sorkin or stolen by Sandra Bullock’s eagle. “MY WHOLE LIFE WAS IN THERE!” I also like the pillow smother (does that even work?). What’s your favorite?
Additionally, we’re still coming to Chicago for a LIVE FROTCAST and SCREENING OF THE RUNNING MAN November 3rd and 4th (Laremy will be there too!). The only difference is, we’re funding it ourselves now, so we worked up a little Kickstarter page, complete with a video starring us – hence the banner image. Yay! Oh, and I’ll have that Mads Brügger interview up on iTunes today, sorry for the lag on that.
So Kickstart our Kickstarter page. Subscribe on iTunes. Email us at frotcast@gmail.com. Voicemail us at 415.275.0030. Follow me on Twitter. Follow Ben on Twitter. Follow Bret on Twitter. Follow Alison on Twitter. Download the Stitcher App and stream the Frotcast to your iPhone or Android device. Fan us on Facebook.
Thanks to Mike the Handsome Hebrew Skyscraper for the flyer.
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Pretty sure Finke was misquoted. There’s no way she didn’t say, “TOLDJA I hate them so much.”
Special guest, The Stig?
Some say he draws pictures of Squirrels and he once bought bones over the internet. All we know is he’s called Bret
Feat. Michael Schumacher as Fake Bret.
Things you always see in movies but never in real life – Halle Berry’s boobs; shoot the hostage; homeless people with hidden talents; animals not completely motivated by food; men that are 5’6″ with super hot girlfriends.
HOLY SHIT. HOW DID YOU GET DAFT PUNK TO COME TO THE FROTQUARTERS?
This was the joke I wanted to make. I had the tools… I just wasn’t quick enough. Well met!
I almost lost my shit at the squirrel drawing on that poster. I love fake Brett so much.
I appreciated the out-of-context tweet, but seriously THAT MASSAGE DUDE SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE CHUCK NORRIS.
Someone really needs to mash those two videos up.
Is the Frotcast shirt as good as the Birthday Dog shirt? Just kidding, nothing is better than Birthday Dog.
Roadhead.
Is that your jerk-off couch?
Its way too nice, and I just know its still filthy from when Joe was there since he had to have fucked it.
Technically, only Vince has a jerk-off couch. That is just a regular, run of the mill Frot Couch.
2.5 hours of people buying you drinks before the Saturday show should make for some great podcasting.
Also, will you be selling the new shirts at the show?
That 40 looks so puny in Brendan’s giant hands.
Is that 40 of Bud Heavy? Jeez.
I know it’s Vince, but I keep seeing the guy from Can’t Hardly Wait.
The tall boy of Steel Reserve really ties the room together.
Upon closer inspection I believe its a PBR
I believe Brendan has a 32 of Bud, and Bret’s is either Pabst, or this other Wales (Wells, maybe?) Bombardier beer that also comes in tall boy cans.
IMPORTANT DISTINCTIONS!!!!
Bret knows to wear protection when Ben’s wank hand is all a’flutter.
Ear-rapist Ben looks a whole lot more “Bro-ish” than I ever pictured him.
In order to get a true sense of scale you have to realize that Brendan is standing BEHIND Vince.
Why is his junk not facing Vince? Inevitable!
Bret why are you wearing a body suit?
Yo, how’d you guys get The Engineer to stand in your photo? Can he give me more life?
Ben is so tan and looks like he works out… wait a minute. Could he be the first Jewish guido? A Gui-brew?!
Hmmm… I prefer being a He-bro…
BEN’S VOICE DOESN’T MATCH BEN’S FACE! BEN’S VOICE DOESN’T MATCH BEN’S FACE! BEN’S VOICE DOESN’T MATCH BEN’S FACE! BEN’S VOICE DOESN’T MATCH BEN’S FACE!
Also, couldn’t you cut off Ben’s Jew horns and milk the Gold from there to pay for the trip?
Bret looks really small. Except for his massive head.
I thought you guys were black.
This could influence my decision to go, will Brett and Brendan be hiding their faces for the live frotcast?
… will vince?
I understand that Ben and Brendon have to hide their faces for their jobs but I don’t get why Vince is just randomly wearing a clown wig
That is fucking funny.
Damn, I really should have made that one of the kickstarter levels, that for a certain amount of money, I will hide my howdy-doody face and bozo the clown jew fro.
Brendan and Bret will be bare-faced, from what I understand.
By howdy-doody, you mean Alfred E. Neuman? #callback
#we’regettingold
Man, that yid is YOKED.
Guilty as charged, you honor.
Since its no longer being outside funded will the location be changing? The U of Chicago is great and the President lives on a really nice street but Hyde Park is roughly 12,856* blocks south of any other patch of civilization (read: more than 20 minutes from my apartment).
*I used mapquest, your results may vary.
I’m not comfortable with seeing video footage of you guys. Whenever i listen i just picture the 4 kids from Stand By Me talking by a campfire… or if I’m feeling horny i just imagine that the 4 girls from Sex and the City just had their voice boxes surgically altered to sound like men.
Who’s the bitchy one in that equation?
Vince should come in costume as Fake Bret. Real Bret should keep the helmet on and lay on the stage making sad bird noises.
I enjoyed the video. You guys should set up a camera and video tape the Chicago show. I’m in Detroit and hope, depending on my schedule, that I can make it out.
Us west coast bros are feeling left out, how about a live frotcast in CA?
You know of any theaters/ locations that would have us? We will travel.
Bret chilling out on the couch with a bike helmet on cracked me up. I can’t put my finger on why.
Also, I’ve been listening to old Frotcast episodes, what happened to Lindy?
She got a job at Gawker and they dont let her do uproxx shit.
Things I see in movies too fucking often: people accidentally eating weed and getting wackily stoned. Actually, older people having hilarious stoned experiences in general.
Blacula is a good blaxploitation. There is some great camp and some solid acting.
“Chained forever to a slavery more vile than any before endured.” When I read that, I think of Morgan Freeman speaking it.
Come to Portland to do a live frotcast. People in Portland are too nice to say no so you could do it at any theater you please I’m sure.