I had a hard time coming up with a headline for the trailer for The Frozen Ground, because it has a few notable highlights. Among them:
- Vanessa Hudgens plays a stripper who writhes around on the ground waving her crotch at people. See? This is what happens when you make a teenage girl star in some wholesome family comedy for her entire childhood. See also: Elizabeth Berkley.
- Nic Cage barks at a dog. At least, I think it’s Nic Cage. Anyway, at about the 46-second mark, there’s someone off-screen barking at a dog, and since Nic Cage is in the movie, I assumed it was Nic Cage. The big question is, was it actually part of the script, or did they just bring the dog out and Nic Cage couldn’t stop barking at it it so they left it in the movie? You decide.
Thanks to the soundtrack, I like to think of Vanessa Hudgens’ little dance number there is called “All Along the Crotchtower.”
Does John Cusack do movies that aren’t about serial killers anymore?
[via Movieweb]
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I feel the trailer needs to just have Manswers sound effects throughout the entire thing.
Video no worky
And these will be .gifs when, exactly?
Looks like Hank was pissing people off at the DEA and got himself a transfer up to Alaska
Like a sequel to Con Air but with Hudgens’z crotch playing Swamp Thing. Which probably needs a wash more than M.C. Gainey, if that’s possible. I think I’ll stop now.
Doesn’t Burnsy love Vanessa Hudgens? I’m afraid this might kill him.
Pfft, ain’t got nothin’ on those old nudie pictures.
I forgot about that! Leaked nude pics are like old hat now.
*emerges from dark room, fills cooler with Gatorade, nods*
.
Strippers that don’t get naked are the silent scourge of Hollywood.
This is relevant to my interests (murder mysteries and shitty Cusack movies, naturally).
are you sure cusack makes shitty movies?
we can only hope hudgens goes full Elizabeth Berkley in it.
Is it strange that Nic Cage barking at a dog probably turns me on more than Vanessa Hudgen as a stripper?
My penis and I approve of the Susan Hoffs imitation in the banner pic.
Susanna. As in, “Oh, Susanna!”
This trailer made me feel more disjointed than a cut up stripper.
*right-click, save as pics nº 3 & 4*
Minuscule detail point: Why do serial killers always wear the same glasses frames? Is that a kind you can order?
Sir, welcome to LensCrafters. What kind of frames would you like?
Do you have anything in a Dahmer?
Isn’t that John Cusack not Nick Cage?
Cusack looks like he’s trying to figure out where she hid her penis.
Amazing.
Serial killers have been with us throughout history and their motives are a mystery to us. I wrote an ebook novel titled BLOODGUILTY about one of history’s most famous “serial killers” which is available in the KINDLE bookstore by RAYMOND THOR.
For a FREE preview, click here:
[www.amazon.com]
There isn’t a major city worth its salt without twenty or thirty missing women on its margins. The only mystery is why some of these clowns can’t dig a hole.
Well I have nothing 2 say but Vanessa playing a stripper,Oh well,It’s her life.
Check out something different but the *same*:
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