UPDATE: Cancer rumor debunked.
Like a lot of people, one of my first thoughts when I read about Tony Scott’s suicide was whether he had some kind of terminal illness. Now ABC reports that “a source close to [Scott]” tells them that the Top Gun director had recently been diagnosed with inoperable brain cancer.
Tony Scott, director of “Top Gun,” “Days of Thunder” and “Crimson Tide,” had inoperable brain cancer, a source close to him told ABC News.
The famed director died Sunday after jumping from a bridge in Los Angeles, authorities said. [ABC]
And… that’s pretty much all we know so far. People like to call suicide “the coward’s way out,” but getting diagnosed with brain cancer and immediately jumping off the tallest bridge you can find (“without hesitation”, according to police reports) sounds pretty damned manly to me. I’m not saying everyone who gets cancer should kill themselves in dramatic fashion, but Tony Scott jumping off the Vincent Thomas Bridge definitely sounds a lot more mature than whatever I would’ve probably done. I’m reminded of Patton Oswalt’s bit about obituaries:
In the obituaries, no one ever dies of cancer. People always give in after a valiant battle with cancer, or they throw in the towel after a courageous fight, which, statistically, can’t be possible. There had to have been a couple of cowardly ordeals in there.
“Bob Smith died today after a craven, cowardly ordeal with cancer, during which he wished the disease on his family and friends and attempted a pact with Satan which left his basement covered in goat’s blood and four boxes of chalk, needlessly wasted, trying to summon a demon who never appeared.”
I’m just saying, I imagine myself being a lot more like Bob Smith, so I give Tony Scott a lot of credit for remaining a cigar-chomping action movie director until his final moments. Hopefully the diagnosis wasn’t just a practical joke to get him to live life to its fullest or something. That would be bad.
[Picture source: NewsDaily]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/Roger-Ebert-Thumbs-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/video-christian-bale-talks-to-leukemia-patient-about-batman-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/11/Top-gun-tony-scott-tom-cruise-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/rip-run-wrake-the-most-talented-dude-youve-never-heard-of-filmdrunk-150x150.jpg)
I was going to say, I couldn’t see this guy biting it unless he had something wrong. His brain answered a page from Kenny Loggins. He’s no longer in the Danger Zone. He always directed the shit out of Denzel, even though Unstoppable was Unwatchable. Man on Fire kicked serious ass, and Crimson Tide is up there with Das Boot. Bummer.
Tony Scott never knowingly looked at an explosion in his life.
The guy directed Denzel to shove a grenade up a dude’s ass.
Respect!
I’m totally autoerotically asphyxiating myself to death if I ever get that kind of diagnosis.
My mom died of cancer when she was 45, and I can understand the whole “quality rather than quantity of life” argument, but did Tony think about his family before he decided to jump? If I had terminal cancer, I would spend every last second of life I had left cherishing my wife and kids…not ending it prematurely. But that’s just my perspective.
I mean, maybe he said his goodbyes and all that? I’d rather go out a little too soon, but with all your affairs settled, than hang on too long and suffer through some real shitty shit at the end.
How young are the twins? I think they might like to have dad around a little longer.
None of our fucking business.
(We’re in the stupid jokes business, and business is booming.)
^ Fair enough. According to the Port Authority statement, Tony was recovered wearing a flight suit with the name “Goose” embroidered on it.
I’ve always thought inoperable cancer is the perfect excuse to escape your teat-clinging wife and kids. But then again, I was raised by Al Bundy through a television set, and am somewhat sociopathic.
Suicide is a coward’s way out, the proper way to cope with terminal cancer is to try and become the a drug kingpin.
What? Humor heals even the freshest wounds!
He really wanted to to it so just went forward without a plan. Quentin Tarantino will be hired later to clean up the mess.
Doctor: So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is that your cancer is…well…”Unstoppable.”
Tony Scott: Fuck you.
Doctor: “So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is that chemotherapy is between you and the oncologist. It’s my job to arrange the meeting.” *makes explosion sounds with mouth* *raises hand for a high five*
Tony Scott: Fuck you.
Doctor: So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is we have several really cutting edge treatment options that we can try, but they are risky. If you you precede I just want to warn you that we would be entering the danger zo..”
Tony Scott: Fuck you.
Doctor: So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is that “I wish…you had…more time!”
Tony Scott: Fuck You.
Doctor: So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is that your days are numbered. But with the right attitude, you can make them Days of Thun-
Tony Scott: Fuck you.
Saint Peter: So what I’m trying to tell you, Tony, is that since you committed suicide…
Tony Scott: Am I going to Hell?
Saint Peter: Remember “Man on Fire”…
Tony Scott: Fuck You.
Saint Peter: Sorry, Tony. This is a train that you can’t stop.
Saint Peter: So what I’m saying, Tony, is that since you’ve let yourself go the past few years, the recovery team is *going to need a bigger boat*.
Tony Scott: That wasn’t me, that was Spielberg.
Saint Peter: Fuck you.
Milo: “Hello, Anthony, this is Milo. There’s a lot of money riding on this film. You better start scoring some box office smashes, or else you’re history.”
Tony Scott: “Fuck you.”
/shoots three producers
//aims gun at head
Tony Scott: “Ain’t life a bitch?”
Perhaps it was a tumor the size of the Chrysler building?
Ridley Scott was seen on the bridge throwing his brothers dog tags into the ocean and did a fly by on Long Beach Airport’s control tower.
it was awesome.
Suicide is a Domino-no. Seriously, was’nt that film unwatchable? RIP
Looks like it’s White Boy Day in Heaven.
Denzel was heard to say “I wish he had more time”.
Just like the A-Team, Tony had no plan B.
It was kind of a dick move of Tony to leave his car on that bridge, as someone who has had to cross that bridge in rush hour, it’s the worst thing ever.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, kill yourself, but in a time and place that’s convenient for me.
So true. Those rush hour jumpers suck. Late at night is best for traffic
I don’t know. Taking yourself out and inconveniencing a lot of people in the process sounds like the best troll ever. Seriously, what are people go to do, yell at you afterward?
If there is one positive to take away from this, it is the possibility that overseeing a ton of cinematic explosions very well may cause inoperable brain cancer.
No one tell this to Michael Bay.
I’m not wishing inoperable brain cancer on anyone but Michael Bay would have to try and top this, right? He has to cover himself in thermite and ride a rocket sled going faster than the speed of sound into a huge cannister of C-4, doesn’t he?
The most confusing thing about this is that he went directly to the bridge. If I was a millionaire who was diagnosed with inoperable cancer I’d have one last orgy before leaping to my death. Or I’d at least eat shitloads of fatty foods first.
And you know he didn’t do this, how?
Prefer Norm Macdonald’s bit, which is similar to Patton’s
“The last thing he did was lose!”
He was all about living fast dying young and leaving a good looking corpse.
respect the romantic-grandiose gesture aspect of it, but seriously it sucks for the family:
* no life insurance payout for suicide
* fucked-up looking corpse
* shock / trauma to all involved
just saying there are more artful ways of doing it – or simply eschew treatment and live balls-out for a few months or whatever. Big-time selfish move.
I think his family will survive without a life insurance payout.
There IS an insurance payout for suicide for certain plans, but only as long as the suicide is past the plan’s “grace period”… sounds so bad, but it’s true. I think it’s like a few years, or something.
Living balls out for a millionaire costs money, money which he could not leave to his family. Not to romanticize or glorify suicide, but in some ways this was just the opposite of selfish.
He’s going to that big volleyball game in the sky.