"Pweeze stop negwecting me!"
Last we checked in on the Fifty Shades of Grey book trilogy, author Erika Leonard – AKA E.L. James, AKA Snowqueen Icedragon – was sitting pretty and incredibly wealthy in the Top 4 spots on the USA Today’s Best-Selling Books List. Of course, how can three books take up four spots? Because the paperback bundle of the entire trilogy is in 4th place. Take that, books that some other losers wrote!
And the last we checked in on the possibility of a Fifty Shades film, there were outrageous rumors that Angelina Jolie might sign on to direct. Sure, we scoffed at that, but it turns out there are some pretty big producers working on what will indeed be a film trilogy produced by Universal Pictures. Michael De Luca (The Social Network, Moneyball) and Dana Brunetti (The Social Network, 21) now stand before millions of horny women who will kill them if they screw this up.
Universal Pictures and Focus Features secured rights to the Fifty Shades trilogy for $5 million in March and have since been looking to fill roles for on screen and behind the scenes.
“At its core, Fifty Shades of Grey is a complex love story, requiring a delicate and sophisticated hand to bring it to the big screen,” Universal Pictures co-chairman Donna Langley said in an announcement. (Via Mashable)
Just $5 million? That seems like a hell of a bargain for what’s sure to be a surefire blockbuster trilogy. I suppose that leaves more money available for Universal to throw $20 million per film at Michael Fassbender so he can pretty much guarantee that no guys ever get laid again.
RELEVANT UPDATE: Dana Brunetti is friends with porn stars so he’s god a solid background.
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I guess nobody saw the sequel to 9 1/2 Weeks
I wanted to beat myself after that one.
Has anyone compared the 50 Shades Series’ time on the best seller list to cat deaths? I’m just saying, there could be some correlation…
As a humble bookseller, these books have been the bane of my existence these last few months. Everyday there are middle aged frumpy cat ladies, giggling at their naughtiness for buying this book. Ugh, the other day there were two of them who needed help finding the best seller section which we hide at the the front of the store. One them grabs a copy and then a second one to hand to her friend but she says “no, I’ll just borrow yours.” The first friend responds “you’re not gonna want to touch this book after I’m through with it,” and they both giggle. I can’t scrub that memory from my brain.
Unfortunately, we need shit books like this that get mass consumed. The increased sales help us make and exceed our sales plans and it means we have more payroll hours.
GAAAHHHH.
Just so everyone’s aware, this series started as Twilight fan fiction. Which makes it even lamer than it already was.
Now we have the memory that we can’t scrub out as well. Thanks, Oski. You are a prince among men.
Isn’t this basically porn, though? How are they going to make this just regular ol’ R without pissing off the fans?
That won’t piss them off. They’ll just do some jumpcuts and creative camera angles and up the THX on all that sweet moaning, and all the cat ladies will eat that shit right up.
I don’t even know if this makes sense within the context of the ‘story’, but I will see the ever living shit out of these movies if they cast Channing Tatum as Grey. I will have to wait for DVD, though. I can only imagine what the theaters will smell like when this is showing.
They better Scotchguard the fuck out of the seats.
A bunch of cat ladies in the theater fingerblasting the shit out of themselves to Channing Tatum. Now THERE is a sexy image!
It’s upsetting that this will make millions and Shame was barely recognized
The only guys who are happy about the success of these books are in the battery business.
Larry, I didn’t stop laughing for three minutes, you magnificent bastard.
I’ve not read the fucking things so can only prejudicially comment on their worth but I just don’t get it. They’ve become a phenomenon because they were treated as a phenomenon and the more of a phenomenon they became, the more the phenomenon proliferated and continues to do so. There’s some kind of genius or juju going on here.
I think it’s a sign of the times. Some celebrities are famous for the sake of being famous, and some stuff is popular for the sake of being popular. I don’t really get it either, and it sucks because it takes everyone’s attention away from the books and movies that actually have some merit. Plus, no men will get laid ever again after these movies come out.
I would not bat an eye if lady-bate movies become the new trend in Hollywood. I just find it disturbing its aimed towards the shouldn’t be sexing.
Like The Twilight Saga: Eclipse, this is exactly how final cut will be determined: [www.youtube.com]
I’d watch 50 shades of Erin Gray for under 30 minutes.
Call the misleading headline police. I thought this post was about Fincher and Sorkin doing the 50 Shades movies, which would’ve been the biggest WTF ever