"So you just grip the shaft with your left hand and then ease your right hand in bit by bit."
If you thought the long holiday weekend would translate into a lazy Tuesday for DVD releases, you were mistaken. It’s another big week, chock full of choices for your viewing pleasure. We’ve got modern-day Shakespeare and at least two psychotic kids. We’ve got hockey enforcers and pastors and porn stars. We’ve got a movie called Memorial Day actually released on Memorial Day (almost). There’s even an ex-president going up against the undead. All that and no vampires or werewolves.
The DVDs:
Coriolanus
We Need To Talk About Kevin
Man On A Ledge
Gone
Goon
Memorial Day
The Aggression Scale
Brother White
96 Minutes
9:06
Valley Of The Sun
The Yellow Wallpaper
Take Me Home
Too Perfect
Silver Tongues
Colin Hearts Kay
Hello Lonesome
Fathers
Abraham Lincoln Vs. Zombies
To Fetch A Predator
If none of the above titles intrigues you, well, you probably just have good taste. Even still, keep reading on the next page and bask in the glow of your own smug superiority. If your DVD player’s broken, click here for this week’s Netflix streaming suggestions.
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Haven’t seen the film, but if it sticks to the source, Coriolanus will be ‘fairly violent’ like Moonrise Kingdom is ‘a bit heavy on the plaid.’
Corny Old Anus is my favorite Shakespeare song.
Shakespeare did not actually write any music. I’m pretty sure that’s his sister to whom you are referring.
Does she scissor?
No?…
I must be thinking of someone else.
Yellow Old Wallpaper of Mars tested poorly with focus groups.
Dammit, The Yellow Wallpaper of Mars. Stupid brain.
Will Man On A Ledge fall off and land in a Phone Booth where he’ll be trapped for 127 Hours until he cuts his arm off to get free?
I will not climb down off this ledge until you confirm that Brother White is Armond’s life story.
Could someone tell me why the hell Youtube’s default video quality is apparently cutting edge for 1997? WHEN I WANT TO SEE A MAN FART HEARTS, I WANT TO SEE IT IN HD, GODDAMN IT.
Did a site search for Boy Wonder, you need to see this movie (Netflix streaming). It’s like Batman crossed with Spiderman, but without the spider or comic bookery.
Judy Greer’s boobs in Adaptation. Just sayin.
Holy shit snacks. That’s good information to have.
We Need To Talk About Kevin was pretty good, I thought.
I love Southland Tales just because it’s so batshit insane.
if anyone understands any creative decision in that movie let me kno
I thought Goon was a pretty good film. I like Seann William Scott as an actor, probably because I’ve never seen “Dude, Where’s My Car?”, even if he does end up playing a lot of Stifler-type characters. I loved him in Road Trip and Role Models. But Jay Baruchel was completely awful in this film. As you mentioned, it’s staggering that he wrote such a useless, annoying character and then said “That’s the guy I want to play”. If you find a different reason to get Scott into a fight at the hockey game and then later have someone to do the “I love you no matter what, bro” moment then they could have cut out the scenes with his weird little amatuer hockey call-in show and replaced them with something entertaining.
“To Felch a Predator” is Chris Hansen’s worst recurring nightmare.