Entertainment Weekly just broke the first pictures from Quentin Tarantino’s slave western, Django Unchained, and I know every time I write about Tarantino, someone in the comments tells me how Tarantino is a hack and how he much sucks, and how gay everyone is for liking him. Well I’d like to cordially invite those people to lick my balls because this looks amazing. All I’ve ever wanted is to combine pulpy Tarantino violence with sumptuous vests and ascots and pocket watches.Violence and period fashion! This movie has everything!
Without getting too much into Entertainment Weekly’s spoilerish rundown, the basic plot is that Jamie Foxx plays a Django, a slave freed by bounty hunter Christoph Waltz, who teaches him the tricks of the trade and helps him find his wife, Broomhilda (Kerry Washington), who ends up in a crazy place called Candyland, where a sadistic slavemaster named Calvin Candy (Leonardo DiCaprio) makes his slaves do gladiatorial-style battle.
I can’t imagine that not being great, unless Tarantino and the wizard get into some bad coke and 40 minutes of the movie ends up being Broomhilda gabbing with her girlfriends about nothing a-la Deathproof. Sidenote: Look at that ornate saddle! I wonder if the production borrowed that from Steven Seagal’s collection.
One more picture below:
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Leonardo-DiGatsbyo-Cigar-dog-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/Leonardo-dicaprio-yelling-150x150.jpg)
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/quvenzhane-jamie_foxx-150x150.jpg)
Weird to think this started out as an adaptation of Candyland.
Hasbro is all about the dollar.
Am I the only one who sees that NOT doing the entire soundrack in gypsy jazz guitar is a tremendous missed opportunity?
My pick for the soundtrack? The Righteous Brothers.
@ Erswi I second that (obviously)
It would certainly give the slave-beatings a much jauntier feel.
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Djangology unparalleled
“Mango Reinhardt…the thinking man’s pop!”
This is Tarantino’s answer to There Will Be Blood. I know that because Daniel Day-Lewis is my spirit animal, and I can feel it in my bones.
I hope you have Photoshop plans for that Leo hammer picture in the future…
Anything Miley Cyrus will do. Just sayin’.
Is it the hack comments that bring out the ball licking retort, or the promise of ball licking that brings out the hack comments?
Chicken or egg?
If my name was Slavemaster Candy I’d smoke blunts through a cigarette holder too.
Who could look at Christoph Waltz in that costume and NOT want to see this?
I love it already.
My first thought was that he is wearing a LOT of layers.
I would gladly watch two hours of Christoph Waltz just walkin’ around in that outfit and makin’ that face.
I have a strong suspicion there will be at least one scene of at least 20 seconds long focusing on a women with bare feet wearing leg iron chains
This movie is most likely going to be a more enjoyable movie experience then probably every summer blockbuster this year. That’s including the new batman movie.
If Mel Gibson made this movie it would be called “Pack of Djangos Unzipped.”
F- and Yes! The only thing I can see going wrong with this is if 70% of the movie is actually Kerry Washignton and DiCaprio playing faro and talking about the long term ramifications of industrialization on the wage worker.
After DiCaprio uses the hammer his slaves are thor.
Is a saloon the 19th century version of a diner? Because I have one guess as to where the movie starts.
“Garçon! Whiskey!”
Actually–how is the wizard not playing the evil slave owner?
I get the feeling I won’t like this as much as The Quick and the Dead for some reason. Feet and Jamie Foxx I suspect.
Even with Jamie Foxx this just made me sploosh all over the fucking place. Wet and sticky and unashamedly a Tarantino fanboy.
I have read the script and it is amazing as f*ck.
This looks like it’ll be fun! I’m glad that Tarantino was able to cross “Off a horse” off of his “50 Places to Rail Coke” list. Next stop: the fin of Great white Shark. Coke Wizard – GET ON IT!
They only way I could want to see this more is if it was called “Bojangles Unchained”.
Jamie Foxx plays Bojangles and Christoph Waltz plays a bounty hunter he meets in a New Orleans jail cell. After helping him escape they track down Bojangles wife who was abducted to settle Bojangles debts. She’s taken to Candyland where Leonardo DiCaprio holds underground dance battles a la “The FP”. Bojangles must dance to save her or die trying.
“Bojangles Unchained” – “This Summer the old soft shoe becomes steel toed”
Starring Uggie as The Dog That Up n’ Died
I’m sure the inspiration for Tarantino was the cut-off foot scene from Roots.
Not ONE person has called Tarantino a hack yet…what the hell is happening to Filmdrunk?
I wonder what other film inspired him and how much of that “inspiration” will be in this movie.
A hammer, Leo! Ham-mur. Repeat? Good boy.
I’m definitely not a racist, but a bearded Jamie Foxx looks, to me the non-racist, like Carl Weathers a la “Predator,” which is awesome for non-racist reasons. I’m not a racist.
Leo’s looking like Bill the Butcher, fingers crossed for an offending eye-pluck!
I can’t imagine that not being great, unless Tarantino and the wizard get into some bad coke and 40 minutes of the movie ends up being Broomhilda gabbing with her girlfriends about nothing a-la Deathproof.
I doubt that would happen, but I’m pretty sure there will be at least one 40 minute long scene with no cut in it. (god I can’t wait…)
Tarantino is, in fact, a hack. I’m also fairly certain that at least some of the people who like him are gay.
On the other hand, HOLY SHIT I am going to see this movie so goddamned hard it’s going to hurt someone.
It’s going to be at least two hours long. There WILL be stupidly long ponderous shots of bullshit philosophy that serve simultaneously to also pay tribute to some obscure European cowboy sub-genre from the 60′s. Yes, of course, there will be feet involved. I mean, obviously.
But Christopher Waltz was easily the best thing about IB, DiCaprio is gonna be badass like a mofo (look at the hammer!). And Jaime Foxx… well, at least it isn’t Will Smith. There’s that.
Bring it on QT! Disappoint me! I fucking dare you!
You forgot to say Tarantino sucks …
coke off a horse hookers ass! Amiright? Guys?
Tarantino sucks! He hasn’t made a good movie since Reservoir Dogs…
HOW MANY COATS IS WALTZ WEARING?!!?!