MTV just released the trailer for Oliver Stone’s Savages, but since that version is region-locked, I’ve got your YouTube copy after the jump.
Oliver Stone adapts author Don Winslow’s best-selling novel into this all-star ensemble crime drama about a pair of peaceful, Laguna Beach marijuana dealers on who are targeted for extortion by the ruthless Mexican Baja Cartel.
Kick-Ass‘s Aaron Johnson plays the Buddhist hippie, and Taylor Kitsch his business partner who conveniently trained as a Navy SEAL. Blake Lively plays their mutual love interest, and Salma Hayek and Benicio Del Toro are the bad guys.
Oliver Stone’s movies are smug and slick and simplistic to the point that they’re basically cartoons, and Wall Street 2 was one of the most hilariously moronic films I’ve ever seen, even funnier because Stone clearly thought he was being so clever. Think Aaron Sorkin as filtered through Kimbo Slice. That said, sex and drugs are his wheelhouse, since he’s basically a pornographer anyway. This should be pretty good, so long as you don’t mind all the characters coming straight from the action movie cliché handbook. “Salma Hayek IS… Dora the Expositora!”
I did enjoy this shot though:
“Don speet on my face and tell me ees raineen, cabrone. I know when ees raineen. For I’m thee rain make air.”
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Make this 90 minutes of Benicio del Toro and Blake Lively in the Dr. Gonzo & Lucy Show and I’d might watch it.
We could charge fifty bucks a head to beat her into submission and then gang-fuck her. We can set her up in one of these back street motels, hang pictures of Jesus all over the room, then turn these fucking pigs loose on her. Hell, she’s strong, man. She’ll hold her own.
I think the voice over ruined it. Who wants to hear Blake Lively talk? Watching any Oliver Stone movie after 2000 is like listening to FOX News and MSNBC at the same time.
So this has NOTHING to do with Fred or his brother, Ben?! The Boy Meets World Fan Club is gonna be LIVID!
DId anyone else get a boner when Del Toro shotguns smoke into the face of sad (under duress? drugged?) Blake Lively?
Because I totally didn’t.
I dunno, I still prefer Erika Christensen being blasted by a big black drug dealer.
Holy attractive people with unisex names and questionable acting skills, Batman.
It’s like Taylor and Blake were made for each other.
Taylor Blake may be the preppiest name imaginable. Their offspring would be wearing boat shoes in utero.
Oh, god. We could have a super race of attractive mediocre actors on our hands. AVERAGE-LOOKING ACTORS WILL NEVER WORK AGAIN.
(*cough*) SHE WAS GOOD IN THE TOWN! (*cough, cough*)
… I still haven’t seen that. It’s been on my Netflix queue forever.
At least we can agree that Taylor Kitsch is basically a handsome cardboard cutout.
Taylor Kitsch thrived in his role in Snakes on a Plane.
He was the guy who smoked weed while joining the mile high club and died five minutes after take off. You can count the number of lines he had on one hand.
Whoa whoa whoa. I thought Sadaam Hussein was dead…
HEY! Why was there no Travolta warning? WHY WAS THERE NO TRAVOLTA WARNING!
Harumph. Indeed. And Salma looked a little thin. I hope her boobs are okay.
If Stone doesn’t treat us to a full thirty second shot of Hayek’s milky udders I’m giving up on cinema altogether.
Fake! Blake can’t play a hippie and shave her legs.
I swear that is nearly the same as the voice over from Kick-Ass.
Taken – Talented lead actor + EDGY STORY GRRR = /mouthfart
You can’t argue with math.
If Zalman King wasn’t dead I’d swear this was Red Shoes VI: Tap Dance in Tequila Town Pt2
The mexicans better win in this, otherwise imma gonna be pissed!
Right?! If this doesn’t end with their 3 heads in a bag on a church doorstep I’m calling shenanigans.
The book is boss, that is all.
It’s about time Tony Scott made another movie.
1992: “Oliver Stone debuts new film at Cannes.”
2002: “Oliver Stone debuts new film at Tribecca Film Festival.”
2012: “Oliver Stone debuts new trailer on MTV.”
2022: “Oliver Stone found masturbating in laundromat.”
This movie has a chance for our first DP in a Hollywood movie since Bijou Phillips destroyed my boner for Anne Hathaway’s tits in Havok.
Wasnt this Called Traffic?
Did anyone else think that picture of Benicio Del Toro was Peter Falk at first?
It’s nice to see Aaron Johnson learned how to lift weights for his role as a hippie Buddhist and not for his superhero role.