Grindin' rails and eatin' grinders, y'all.

Remember Val Kilmer on a BMX from a few weeks ago? Besides being perfect FilmDrunk Photoshop fodder, it comes from a film by Harmony Korine called “The Fourth Dimension,” which is actually the first of a series of three films, with the next two to be directed by Aleksei Fedorchenko and Jan Kwiecinski. The trailer is below, and besides featuring Val Kilmer as a motivational speaker wearing a bolo tie and fanny pack, and having an awesomely weird auto-tune soundtrack, the titles seem to indicate that the series is part of a Dogme 95-like pledge by the participating filmmakers. Here’s the full text:

Dear director from another land. Here are your instructions. You must forget everything you know. It needs to blur the line between what is real and what is fake. We must never know the truth. You must show us a glimpse of the fourth dimension. We are counting on you.

If you truly “forget everything you know,” wouldn’t you mostly just lay on the floor shitting yourself and drooling? That’s the problem with these pretentious artsy types, their grandiose words are always so full of assumptions and ambiguity. That said, if your “art” happens to include Val Kilmer in a fanny pack and bolo tie giving speeches at a roller rink, sign me up for a monogrammed beret.

The international anthology feature The Fourth Dimension will screen in the Viewpoints program of the 2012 Tribeca Film Festival Tuesday, April 24. Jan Kwiecinski, Aleksey Fedorchenko and Harmony Korine directed the film’s three shorts, one of which stars Val Kilmer as a motivational speaker.

The film will have its world premiere at the San Francisco International Film Festival April 20. [THR]

Well color me hurriedly filling out press credentials for the San Francisco International Film Festival. SPLOOSH.