On a day that included a story about Gary Busey arguing over the production design of heaven, this seemed especially relevant. Seriously, every single thing about this story is awesome. First off, he yelled his own name, much like Steve Holt! Only awesome people go around yelling their own names. FACT. Secondly, he’s a trend-setter. How much you want to bet LFMAO will be wearing dark puffy jackets, sombreros, and boxing gloves on one hand soon? (Is that you, Art Jimmerson?) Thirdly, he’s named “Jesse James.” For an outlaw who murdered people, Jesse James sure got a lot of namesakes. Hitler and Stalin never managed that. And finally, every good crime story should end “the suspect was found nearby, lying in the street.”
This is just the best.
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That mugshot’s legendary enough. If only the sombrero made it in.
PLEASE tell me Rip Torn has the other boxing glove.
Jesse James???
*huffs a few helium balloons, shrieks through sinuses*
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS LIKE CAN YOU BELIEVE HE COULDN’T JUST, LIKE, TOTALLY EAT THAT GIRLS PUSSY AND JUST CHILL OUT???
One time my friend dated a girl in high school who moved to Fairfield Street and then one time she had a party so we drove to Sacramento and I french-kissed her fat friend who also lived on Fairfield Street and another friend I know is good friends and an old roommate with Urijah Faber and he said Faber used to nail hella chicks and is super small.
Did Faber ever practice his Brozillian Bro-Jitsu on the roommate? Gotta make sure that Brolotine is nice and tight (It is cheaper than GHB, after all).
greatest thing i’ve seen all day, and I’ve been staring at my dick the whole day.
Would be cool if his name was Leroy Jenkins though, just to get the full effect. LLEEERRRROOOOYYYY JJEEEEEENKIIINNSSSS!!!!
Leroy Jenkins is appropriate, but I prefer Big Don Watts, because the only way to shout it is matter-of-factly.
Black dude with a Confederate namesake is bound to be troubled.
/nice of you to refer to him as “the suspect.” “Suspicion of being drunk” seems generous as well.
Now THAT is the mugshot of a guy who wants his sombrero back.
Either that or the photo was taken at the exact moment he remembered where he left his other boxing glove.
If Bubba Hotep thought JFK was going down without a fight he was sorely mistaken.
Man, Danny Glover has really fallen on hard times.
he’s definitely too old for this shit, so he took a street nap
I propose a day of solidarity in which we all wear sombreros and march on Suckramento. You will hear our voice, Jerry Brown!
Kony 2012.
Peace out.
More awe inspiring drinking news…
An albino woman complained to the British Columbia Human Rights Tribunal that the “White Rhino” name for a restaurant’s house beer violated her. In the course of making her case she inadvertently came up with best drink name ever.
“You go into a restaurant and someone says, ‘Can I get a palsy? Give me a palsy,’” she said. “And what it stands for is a cerebral palsy cocktail. I don’t think that would fly well at all with anybody with cerebral palsy”
[ca.news.yahoo.com]
White people problems.
He looks like he’s doing an impression of Kenan Thompson doing an impression of Whoopi doing an impression of her mother.