
Michael Fassbender famously unsheathed his monstrous uncut wang in Shame, one of the many films for which he earned rave reviews in 2011, including X-Men Girth Class, Haywang, A Dongerous Method, and the upcoming Promethenis. We’ve taken to referring to he and his wang as Michael and the Fasspenis, and it seems we’re not the only ones who can’t stop talking about it. Charlize Theron even expressed her desire to work with it at a Human Rights Campaign Gala recently. In other news, it’s good to be Michael Fassbender.
Referencing Fassbender’s full-frontal work in Shame, Theron quipped, “I have to say that I was truly impressed that you chose to play it big. Most other actors would have gone small, trust me. No, I know because I’ve worked with them.”
The Oscar-winner didn’t stop there. “Your penis was a revelation,” she said to the howling audience. “I’m available to work with it any time.” [EW]
No one’s ever called my penis a revelation, and I’ve had sex with countless altar boys. Anyway, these jokes are all fun and games now, but just wait till he gets married someday and his poor wife has to endure all manner of people walking bowlegged around her, pantomiming hot dogs down hallways, echo jokes, etc. The only consolation is that she’ll probably torn in half before she can hear any of it.
Pic source: Featureflash / Shutterstock.com



Hollywoods newest celebrity couple/dance move, everybody do The Ronbender.
*Hollywood’s
When reached for comment, Kristen Stewart gave a constipated sigh.
Rita corny, Michael!
+10
Never mind this fascination with his big cock, has F.Assbender learned to order 3 whiskeys in German properly yet?
why aren’t we referring to him as the fassboner?
Because wubwubwubREEeeEeRRR big things have small beginnings wubwub
REEEeeRRRRRrr BRAAAAAAAAHHMMM!
(wishful thinking)
My penis is a renovation.
No surprise here, African American chicks love big dongs.
Wait, what does she mean by “play it big”? Is she implying there was some prosthetics involved, or perhaps some extra fluffing?
Is that an unphotoshopped banner image? You’re f*cking fired, Vince.
OK. Now I have to see this dick.
Mine is like an M. Night Shyamalan revelation. But not the Sixth Sense or Unbreakable. One of the other ones.
Your penis will save the world from plants? I’d like to meet this penis. In an apartment swimming pool.
[www.youtube.com]
Excellent idea for all the Prometheus posters to feature that giant head on its posters.
Yes. Posters. Did I mention the posters? Just making sure; posters.
My penis is a revulsion. According to
my last girlfriendeveryone who’s seen it.My penis was in Revelations. I call my wife’s vagina the Seventh Seal.
I scrolled down to post a similar comment…I take my hat off to you!
…and then soundly whap you with it like the Skipper.
COTW
I believe when Charlize said “revelation”, she was referring to the Book of Revelation. Michael, his penis, and his two balls are the Four-Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
I love that the picture you chose was Charlize holding hands with Stuart Townsend, who is clearly shorter than her. Stuart can take down his voodoo doll shrine to Viggo and replace it with one for the Fasspenis now.
You know, its about time that the penis is finally getting the respect it deserves in the realm of cinema. For too long, the wang has always been hidden or sheltered by fancy camera tricks and idiots who can’t understand the majesty and strength a penis evokes.
Michael F. Assbender and the dead guy from Bullitt have made a movie that is trailblazing for the penis movement. They need to be awarded in anyway possible. I’m glad that Filmdrunk is on the forefront of this and I applaud Vincini for bearing the torch of awareness.
“Most other actors would have gone small, trust me. No, I know because I’ve worked with them.”
Why the hate on Patton Oswalt?