In a move that seems inconceivable for a man who’s starred in at least two low-budget movies a year since the 80s and to my knowledge is the only celebrity to have appeared on both Celebrity Apprentice and Celebrity Wife Swap, Gary Busey has filed for bankruptcy. Busey’s claim, filed yesterday, states that he has less than $50,000 in assets, while he owes between $500,000 and a million dollars to a variety of creditors, including the IRS, Wells Fargo, L.A. County Waterworks Districts, a storage company, and possibly a woman who sued him for allegedly attacking her at an airport in Tulsa. Women, can’t live with ‘em, can’t headbutt ‘em at a baggage claim.

So many debts, but does a briefcase filled with highlighters and spare change count for nothing?? These markers once belonged to the Shah of Iran, Butthorn!

67-year-old Busey filed for Chapter 7 bankruptcy in California yesterday. Busey checked the box showing he has less than $50,000 in assets … and somewhere between $500,000 and $1,000,000 in various debts.

Interestingly, we shot Gary out in Malibu on Monday — a day before he filed — and he didn’t seem all that fazed by the whole bankruptcy thing … dancing his face off in a parking lot (video below). [TMZ]

His manager Ron Sampson wrote in a statement the filing provides Busey “a new and clear path” to personal and career success. [AP]

Busey later added, “That’s right, I’m ready to turn over a new leaf. I’ve put all my financial affairs in the capable hands of my manager, Ron Sampson, the smartest goddamned St. Bernard I’ve ever met. C’MERE BOY, COME AND GET SOME TACOS!”

“Bankruptcy? Bankruptcy’s just a word. But have you ever thought about what it means? Bankruptcy: Building Alternate Nutria Kernels Right Under Putin’s Torpedo Circumcisionry Yard. THAT’S what bankruptcy means. I’ll either climb out of debt the old fashioned way or have a hell of a lot of coyote pelts.”