Okay, you guys know how this works by now. We nominate for comments of the week by copy and pasting in the comments section below throughout the week. Then I let YOU vote for the winner by using the reply function for some reason.
Here’s the winner you chose:
[From The Rock wants to run for president someday]
Good Grief: Whenever a wrestler talks about “high places,” Owen Hart sheds a single tear.
Oh, dead wrestler jokes, will you ever go out of style? So email me your address and shirt size, Mr. (or Ms.) Good Grief. And for the rest of you non-comment-of-the-week-winning losers, don’t get down, you can still get a FilmDrunk shirt of your own the old-fashioned way: by trading money for it! Get your shirt here! Now available in both Irish Green (pictured) or Drunk Asian Guy Red!
And now for your runners up:
Mustafa Dystrophy: “Lets focus on the film people.” “Okay, so did you Rampart of your anatomy into Roseanne or not?
[Same post]
Chino Moreno: I told my prom date that I wanted to be deflowered and he just took my corsage back.[From Russell Crowe set to star in My Big Fat Australian Dracula Detective, or Gladiator: Dracula Cop.]
ChinoMoreno: Vampire the Buffet Slayer.[From Big Miracle flops like whale titties]
Feklhr: In Big Miracle 2: Humpback Sperm Boogaloo, Drew Barrymore returns as “Queefqueg”, an amphibious superheroine that can fire harpoons outta her c*nt. BLOW ME DOWN!
Well done! And better luck next time! Now here are your honorable mentions.
[Russell Crowe Dracula Detective post]
ChinoMoreno: Crowe’s headquarters are located in The Outback Stake House.
Moose: Dracula will prep his victims by spreading Vegemite on their necks.
ChinoMoreno: Crowe wears a string of garlic bread around his neck at all times.
[From Every movie trailer from the Super Bowl]
Burnsy: I can’t wait to see the alien say “QUAR GOK CHEE GUARK!” translated to “You sank my battleship.” BECAUSE YOU KNOW THEY F*CKING WILL.
Moose: Black Widow fights criminals by Tae bo kicking their shins and then blowing on her whistle until a man arrives.
[From Larry the Cable Guy stars in The Tooth Fairy 2: Insert your own redneck teeth jokes]
Good Grief: “So many purdy mouths, so little time!”
[From The new poster for Zombie Ass: Toilet of the Dead]
Crapbasket:
Zombie, or not zombie?
The ass is the question.
Whether ’tis nobler in the vag to stuff her
The karate and liberating farts of outrageous Megumi
Or to take arms against a sea of tapeworms
And in opposing them, to pee, to feek
Is “feek” short for feces? I’ve never heard that before.
And finally, from Indian politicians resigning after being caught watching porn on a cell phone include the ministers of cooperation, women and child development:
Morton Salt: You want to know what kind of porn it was? I’m guessing some poon jab clips.
WORDPLAY!
That’s it for this week, y’all. Don’t forget to nominate your favorite comments throughout the week and vote for the best at the end of the week. THAT WAY WE CAN KEEP DOING THIS AGAIN AND AGAIN! Exciting, isn’t it?



Wait, so I tweef you my jokes about Russel Crowe and they’re not good enough for Comments of the Week? It’s enough to drive a guy to drink… gravy.
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What she/he said!
My browser doesn’t recognize **c 0′ m – domains.
Is “feek” short for feces? I’ve never heard that before.
FYI: Feek may either describe the object or the act; i.e. I just blew a feek out of my ass/I feek; I’m feeking; I feeked.
“I feek therefore I am.” – First sentence of Brendan’s Bible.
I avoid using the word “feek” because I’d hate to accidentally offend a nearby Klingon.
You mean you guys HAVEN’T been pronouncing it “FEEK-hoo-la-hey” this whole time???
“I feek you feek we feek” – Feek Nasty
feek – [feek] verb, noun;
1. verb; To void excrement from the bowels through the anus.
2. noun; A piece of excrement
I came up with this during a drunken rampage concerning a fool who can’t get all of it in the bowl, and aborting “shit” because a child walked up. Strange how whit trash that sounds given the actual circumstances. Anyways, I’d like to start an Urban Dictionary campaign to replace it’ current iteration as Irish slang for lashing den guts.
Jesus that whole comment is an autocowreck clusterfuck.
*sings* I fink you’re feeky and I like you a lot . . .
Damn it Jersey Devil, I JUST got that song out of my head. Gahhhhh
I dunno what it is with these people, but I can’t get enough . . .
[www.youtube.com]
Thank you all for voting. I’m chuffed to bits!
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Mustafa Dystrophy:
Read the script, it’s a little heavy-handed.
INT. – DINER – DAY
WAITRESS: What’ll ya have?
THORNTON: Gimme a bowl ethereal.
–
porkythefirst : Little known Billy Bob fact: he is the evil doppelganger of Garth Brooks’ failed “Chris Gaines” alter-ego brought to life via blood sacrifice.
Seconded! Following last week’s “Rampart” comment, he’s two for two in hard-to-reach puns.
That was beautiful
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Alcoholics Gratuitous: When Gina expressed shock that she’d be getting another shot as a leading lady after Haywire flopped, the Hollywood executive said, “You haven’t been super pretty for very long have you?”
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
porkythefirst: It’s actually not a Soul Patch, but a style Billy Bob refers to as a “Bottom Hitler.”
Second Al Gratu
Because it’s a little pricey, you only find the “Bottom Hitler” at the nicer Jewish bath houses.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Feklhr
Swinging With the Finkels? Maybe when I am tired of flogging the dolphin with the laces out…
Wa’qa wa’qa wa’qa! *batleth bowtie spins, Ferengi on unicycles juggle live gaH*
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Morton Salt:
Dwayne your Johnson
Second Mort.
JimB, [filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
I could be wrong, but is that Vince Vaughn in the background of the banner pic?
This is fantastic.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Mustafa Dystrophy
I love the scene where Jacky takes two baby cows on a merry-go-round, and the beef inspector gives him a ticket for spinning his veals.
I laughed out loud at this. From the “Twinks in Trouble” thread . . .
Panzerschwein
It’s like Harry and the Hendersons, but sexy.