Sorry to preemptively dismissive wank my own headline, but this is just kind of a dumb non-story all around, that I have to cover anyway because I already brought it up the other day. Basically, Sacha Baron Cohen wanted to attend the Oscars in character as The Dictator, as he’s done with other characters at other Awards shows in the past, like when he fake teabagged Eminem at the MTV audio YouTube Awards or whatever. Long story short, the Academy said no. Which has led to no shortage of “BARON COHEN BANNED FROM OSCARS!” headlines. But he didn’t actually get banned, the Academy just basically said “Please don’t punk us, Mr. Funny Man, we are very old.”
“We haven’t banned him,” an Academy spokesperson tells The Hollywood Reporter. “We’re just waiting to hear what he’s going to do.”
Still, the Academy is making it clear that Cohen is not welcome to use the red carpet as a platform for a promotional stunt for his upcoming movie The Dictator, and other sources say the threat of booting him became more substantial on Wednesday.
THR’s story prompted the Academy to notify Cohen’s reps and Paramount, the studio behind both Hugo and Dictator, that it would like to know exactly what Cohen has planned. “We don’t think it’s appropriate,” the Academy spokesman tells THR of the prospect of Cohen “hijacking” the red carpet to plug his movie. “But his tickets haven’t been pulled. We’re waiting to hear back.” [THR]
Of course they don’t think it’s appropriate. They’re old farts planning a stodgy, self-mythologizing awards show. You wouldn’t want actual levity to ruin a night of Billy Crystal numbers and dead-people montages, would you? But then, if Sacha Baron Cohen had had any intention of actually pulling a stunt, he wouldn’t have asked permission first. “So, uh… I’m interested in renting your apartment. And by the way, I’m planning on having huge parties there every weekend, with cocaine and llama fights and shit.”
Obviously, getting “banned” and having people write about it was the plan all along. So congratulations, Sacha Cohen and Paramount, looks like you got that part covered. Collect your dismissive wank and commemorative mouthfart on the way out. (The fart comes in a Lululemon tote bag!).