“I was too busy pretending to direct and edit my film over actual talented people’s shoulders, in between Pilates sessions and yelling at my staff, that I simply couldn’t write a song! So then I called some producers and had them write one for me, then had them Autotune it so you could all praise me for being so multi-talented.
Also, if I had a heart, this dress would be tight enough to crush it.”
I’m pretty sure she said “MY film” 15 or so times during that speech. And she was always sure to overly pronounce the “MY” part in case anyone didn’t know she made a movie (I didn’t until last night, so congrats lady).
I starting watching the Golden Globes with the sole purpose of having some material for Film Drunk commenting. After 3 minutes and sever fleeting suicidal thoughts I pulled up netflix and then proceeded to spend half an hour rolling on the floor laughing at my made up gay porn movie title: Hot Cum Guy Machine
I think if the “War Horse” previews had that “Amazing Horse” YouTube video music playing over it, along with a quick shot of the FassPenis when it says “tug on its winkie,” I might actually go see it.
Forget her shitty music, forget her “look at me I have an accent”/”fuck people who are inconsiderate enough to give me hydrangeas”/ “face the wall so you don’t look her in the eye” cuntiness. Let’s just look at her effect on Guy Ritchie: before Madonna, amazing. During Madonna: absolute crap. After Madonna: working toward redemption.
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Halfman!
Just give Dinklage an Oscar already.
Ugh the stuff that won is all shit. Hollywood is the human centipede of industries and it seems the globes are third in line.
*Pushes up thick rimmed glasses*
Clooney is such a johnny-cum-lately, I was a fan of Fassbender’s huge dick before it was big thing.
GoT should copy The Artist and bring the direwolves next year. Automatic victory!
Madonna needs to crawl into a cave somewhere and not come out until she’s gained some humility. So, never, basically.
Really, guys, I cannot get over Madonna’s speech.
“I was too busy pretending to direct and edit my film over actual talented people’s shoulders, in between Pilates sessions and yelling at my staff, that I simply couldn’t write a song! So then I called some producers and had them write one for me, then had them Autotune it so you could all praise me for being so multi-talented.
Also, if I had a heart, this dress would be tight enough to crush it.”
I’m pretty sure she said “MY film” 15 or so times during that speech. And she was always sure to overly pronounce the “MY” part in case anyone didn’t know she made a movie (I didn’t until last night, so congrats lady).
I starting watching the Golden Globes with the sole purpose of having some material for Film Drunk commenting. After 3 minutes and sever fleeting suicidal thoughts I pulled up netflix and then proceeded to spend half an hour rolling on the floor laughing at my made up gay porn movie title: Hot Cum Guy Machine
Gervais’ Eddie Murphy joke was stolen from the Filmdrunk comments section. He should start writing for SNL’s Weekend Update.
So they had Gervais back so he could pull punches and get made fun of himself as penance for being amusing last year. Awesome job.
I think if the “War Horse” previews had that “Amazing Horse” YouTube video music playing over it, along with a quick shot of the FassPenis when it says “tug on its winkie,” I might actually go see it.
To paraphrase a Greg Giraldo joke from the Flava Flav Roast:
Madonna looks like a skeleton wrapped loosely with lunch meat.
Forget her shitty music, forget her “look at me I have an accent”/”fuck people who are inconsiderate enough to give me hydrangeas”/ “face the wall so you don’t look her in the eye” cuntiness. Let’s just look at her effect on Guy Ritchie: before Madonna, amazing. During Madonna: absolute crap. After Madonna: working toward redemption.
Is it just me or does anyone else find it ironic that “The Guard” got robbed?
Vince’s 49ers live tweeting WAS MUCH MORE BABY PUNCHY AND CAPS LOCKY ARRRRGGGH
Naw that was a pretty good monlogue!
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