After the jump, I’ve got the new trailer for Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, starring Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock, based on the Jonathan Safran Foer novel. This is also “the Daldry” that New Yorker critic David Denby said he was looking forward to in his email to producer Scott Rudin yesterday. As in, the new movie from director Stephen Daldry (The Reader, The Hours, Billy Elliot), who seems to make movies specifically for New Yorker critics.
…the story focuses on Oskar Schell (played by newcomer Thomas Horn), a nine-year-old boy from Manhattan whose father (Hanks) dies on 9/11 [So would you call it... OSKAR BAIT? ...I'm so sorry. -Ed]. Two years later, the boy discovers a key belonging to his father, which sends him on a search through the city, believing it will lead to a final message from his deceased parent. [ThePlaylist]
This looks great. I’ll probably throw on a wool caftan, light a few sandalwood candles, and curl up with a nice glass of Pinot Gris. Then after I have myself a good cry, I’ll probably throw the old James Taylor Greatest Hits CD in the Prius and go for a nice drive.
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“Extremely loud and incredibly close” is also a perfect description of the Wayans family.
Tears = lube.
Hey, you leave James Taylor out of this.
SPOILER ALERT: The message his dad left reads, “Holy crap, I just found out Robert Pattinson works in my building!”
Seriously, Jonathan Safran Foer is like the hippie Stephanie Meyer
*hipster Stephanie Meyer
Wasn’t that the tagline for Fatal Attraction?
As a fan of irony, my only hope for this film is that someday a passenger on an airplane decides he’d rather take over the craft and crash it in a Pennsylvania field than sit through all two hours of it.
Things I found among my father’s belongings after he died:
A dagger with a handle fashioned to resemble a naked lady.
A casino chip with a picture of a kitten on it and the caption, “A little pussy never hurt anybody.”
A fountain pen from ‘Anita’s Whore House’.
Cufflinks fashioned to look like two cherubs jerking off.
Where was this guy when he was alive?
Absolutely true, BTK.
I hope he finds his dad’s old school porno stash and a note:
“Well if you could figure all that out, you deserve to see 80s bush. They don’t have shit like this anymore, quality trim all of it.
Love,
Dad”
It wasn’t until I stopped hanging out at the Penn State AD that I figured out that a ‘tear jerker’ didn’t mean what I thought it did.
So this is kinda like The Wall but less relevant and minus the cool rock star parts?
Rip Torn for menopausal ladies: Extremely Drunk, Incredibly Loused, has a new boxcar.
Guy’cha! Can you believe some of the things this website says to Him before He puts it through the universal translator???
Somewhere in the deep south, someone who’s never even been to New York will think it’s their patriotic duty to see this movie, due to the 9/11 backdrop.
It’s cool though, y’all. I’ma castrate them.
The book was extremely irritating and incredibly cloying. Looks like the movie nailed it.
If the kid opens the last door and finds Tom Hanks holed up in a luxury condo in Jersey, banging a supermodel on a pile of 9/11 insurance scam cash…I’ll stand up and start slow clapping.
*Fingers crossed* the kid finds out that Tom Hanks faked his own death so he could ditch Sandra Bullock and go bang some tattoo-covered Nazi chick.
I liked Everything Is Illuminated.
But that might be because of the dude from Gogol Bordello. He was entertaining. Plus, if this was prison I would totally rape Elijah Wood.
If my four choices are war horse, new Year’s eve, We Bought a Zoo or this, I’ll go with #5, getting bludgeoned with this dipshit’s rock.
/jk, I’d rather watch this in the Clockwork Orange theater than see 5 minutes of NYE.
Looks plane ridiculous.
Yer changin’ that boy’s lahfe.
No, he’s still a twee fuckstick.
That trailer has a strong resemblance to another adaptation. Charlie St Cloud anyone?
Is it weird to get a gay vibe from a kid this young? Did anyone else think he was wearing lipstick in that opening scene with the voice mail recording?
This movie’s target audience is people who loved the Da Vinci Code but wished there was less Tom Hanks and more precocious, fast-talking kids with punchable faces
I actually read the book, too. It was total twee, hipster, pseudo-magical realist, shit. I fucking hate Jonathan Safron Foer.
I love that in the email exchange Denby is hard as a rock for this but wouldn’t write a review of “We Bought A Zoo” just so he could wipe his ass with it.