"A Four-Word Review of War Horse"
Expect a call, son.
That’s what Katherine the Great said…
i’m really hoping it doesn’t get nominated for Best Picture so I can not watch it ever.
I can’t wait for “This Ain’t War Horse XXX” *nays and clops away*
“Whore Horse” or “War Whore.” Both, probably.
Ironically female horses daydream about smaller cocks.
That horse was the bravest solider I’ve ever seen!
things I’d rather do than see War Horse: give Magic Johnson a blowjob, perform my own vasectomy, shop at the local mall during christmas.
1. Insert 2. SJP 3. Joke 4. Here
Significantly less Cheri O’Teri horse racing in those screen grabs than I was expecting
Casting Sarah Jessica Parker as the title character in a war movie was pretty ballsy.
Cat’s Eye did it better.
You know, this is the same horse who starred in Zoo. Classic Hollywood story of fucking your way to the top.
SJP in Worst Whore, maybe. I understand the confusion.
I’m holding out for MMA Chimp: Rainforest Octagon.
I always sorta felt like “Choco Taco” was a racist term for Puerto Ricans.
When I am 16 or 20 I will buy my own war hores.
The second picture is when the horse was informed Gabourey Sidibe was cast to be his civilian owner/rider.
Tears for Glue
That horse change my life.
Wasn’t that the tagline for Sex and the City 2?
The naval-themed sequel?
Horse Seamen: Coming Ashore
And then the movie about readjusting to life on the homefront and falling in love.
I’m thinking something like Hoof Hearted.
During Passover, horse d’ouevres are served on moxie.
“That Horse Had Moxie” – How rich white people tune their ukuleles.
Vin Diesel is going to have some stiff competition for the Oscar. That horse can emote.
When my horse had too much moxie, I turned him into epoxy.
Don’t make fun, I live in Boston, and Moxpoxy is how we get through the puritanical winters. And summers.
Andy Serkis was actually the horse.
Saw this movie, it was really, really really cheesy. Only good thing was the battle of the Somme. The whole thing felt like a play.
What I expect with a title like that…
Its the late 1880s, the steed of Ares is loose on Earth minus his master. The horse is leaving a wake of death and destruction looking for its owner. The monster has slaughtered a tribe of indians. They attribute the deaths to White Men, not a supernatural beast. A regional war is coming from this misunderstanding. Investigating the massacre, Buffalo Bill and Calamity Jane come to a unbelievable conclusion – that’s not a mortal creature. Now it’s up to them to convince the soon to be warring tribes that the true reason is something far, far worse than any White Man.
Worse yet the implication that the Gods of Greece might be in America – to what end? The pursuit of steed leads them to an even worse discovery; Mount Olympus is amidst a civil war… Zeus is dead.
The War Horse is the least of their worries.
Something like that could be the start of a trilogy with the last installment having Cody ride the beast into Olympus guns a blazing putting an end to their war; a battle which could mean the end of mankind.
Now that’s what I call a “War Horse”.
Boner. Pure and simple.
Why is Shia Lebeef crying?
A legitimate comic sans opportunity, just FRITTERED AWAY.