Oh this is just great. I love what you've done with it. I love how you got every member of the all-star team in there, complete with explosions and as many guns as you could cram in there. Give them what they want, am I right? And great work on the names too, the way it's just one name per person, it really drives home the point that they're all such legends that-- WAIT! WAIT A SECOND, STOP THE PRESSES, THESE POSTERS ARE ALL WRONG! IT'S GOING TO NEED TO BE REDONE! We can't move forward with this! What it SHOULD say is, "Stallone|Statham|Li|Lungren|Norris|SOME CHICK|Van Damme|Hemsworth..."
Alas, poor A-Brode, I knew him well. If he was guilty of any crime, it was brooding too much.
What is it about closed eyes that makes a person seem complex and tortured? My eyes are closed a lot. Because I like to nap.
This is the first of four weird graphic posters for Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, starring Nic Cage and directed by Armond White's favorite filmmakers, Neveldine and Taylor. As SlashFilm puts it:
Sony has gone “different” with the marketing, too, shying away from traditional character one sheets in favor of a few bad ass graphic representations of Johnny Blaze’s alter-ego, Ghost Rider.
Either that or they're just trying to save money. You know how much ink it takes to print Nic Cage's forehead alone? As much as he spends on snake venom and dinosaur skulls, at least.
[poster via JoBlo]
I like it as a t-shirt. I don't know if I'd call it a "poster" though. Kind of looks like a Black Flag album.
[poster via JoBlo]
Holy shit, is Brian Grazer in this?
Now we've gone from t-shirt design to velvet painting. But hey, kudos for trying something different, I guess. It kind of reminds me of the weird Polish posters.
I think Hugo Cabret looks great and the early reviews have come back overwhelmingly positive, so it's a bit of a disappointment that they still did the diagonal thing with the posters.
Oh, this is disappointing. When you've got a hot chick like Chloe Moretz, don't cover her up with a bunch of baggy clothes and stupid hats, sex her up a bit! ...Aw, crap, did I type that out loud? FORGET EVERYTHING YOU READ HERE! THIS WEBPAGE DOES NOT EXIST! (*throws laptop out window, checks peephole for Chris Hansen*)
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES, HE'S SIDEWAYS!
Aw, I know Dobermans (Dobermen?) are supposed to be scary, but really I just want to give him a hug. He looks like he could use a buddy. I could be that buddy. I'm a great friend, especially if you're a dog.
Awwww, yeeeeah, Special K knows what'll make you feel better, how about a mustache ride? By the way, is that the man in the moon taking a nuclear warhead to the eye socket back there? That's extreme. I thought this movie was for kids.
YEAH, YOU'RE BRITISH, WE GET IT ALREADY.
A movie starring the Octomom? No way in hell I'm looking this one up. I don't know who's grosser, her or Michelle Duggard. How is it illegal to sew up someone's vagina? It shouldn't be. There's something so disgusting about her. I think it's that her overstuffed collagen-injection lips remind people of her swollen, banged up vagina.
This is kind of the crappiest poster design ever, but that makes it intriguing. It's a smart idea. As a side note, all it would take to make this an inspirational Christian movie poster is a bright sunset in the background. Something about bright sunsets really make it seem like Jesus loves you.
If you'll remember, this is the film Todd Phillips produced using all first-time actors. It's a good poster, but his fashionable clothes make me feel really old.
This is an Asian poster for Puss in Boots, and it's one of the most Asian looking things I've ever seen. I don't even think that's the main character. It's like someone just said, "Hey, y'all Orientals like cats with big eyes, right?"
If you've actually seen Shame like I have (review coming soon), you know that's Michael Fassbender admiring his own giant penis. As well he should.
I still can't get over the fact that they're still trying to make a separate movie called Spy vs. Spy. Or how completely idiotic this entire premise is. Here's the trailer, by the way. The war is against the viewer.
I bet Eddie Murphy was all like, "PLEASE DON'T PHOTOSHOP MY FACE BEYOND RECOGNITION-- mmmph! mmm! fffph! mmpp!"
They just slapped that title tape right across his face mid-sentence. Poor bastard. He can't hear you now.
A Thousand Words. If only someone involved had said that all-important one, "No."
Uh oh, I know what it means in movies when someone puts their hand up to their temple like that. I saw it in X-Men. I think it means someone's about to get assbent.
Tucker and Dale vs. Evil. I've seen the movie and I don't even know who that big guy in the foreground is supposed to be. I assume he represents evil? Cool dog though.
Jason Reitman is awesome and I'm hoping this is great, but that seems like a really shitty, reductive tagline. Also, if they wanted to represent her not growing up, they should have her pulling down her pants to show that she's all shaved down there. Because she's trying to act immature, you know? Okay, maybe it wouldn't have made sense, but you have to admit it'd be pretty cool, seeing her snatch like that.
NICE TORSO, GIRAFFE LADY, WOULD YOU LIKE SOME ACACIA LEAVES?
[All posters via IMPA unless otherwise noted]
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/06/the-hobbit-the-desolation-of-smaug-poster-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/only-god-forgives-poster-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/04/star-trek-into-darkness-alice-eve-chris-pine-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/this-week-in-posters-the-rock-is-jacked-in-pain-and-gain-150x150.jpg)
I’ve been angry, but I don’t think I’ve ever been Seagal-finding-out-he-didn’t-get-to-be-in-The-Expendables angry.
MO-CAP: Stallone’s doing it wrong.
The poster says “Li.” I’m just going to assume that’s the name of the Asian chick too.
(because it’s technically MO-BERET, y’see)
GHOST RIDER 2: Despite all his rage, there’s no room for Nicholas Cage.
(but there IS a bullet with butterfly wings. Or is that an anus?)
EX2 = Cacoon with guns instead of pods.
More like Adrian BROODY, am I right?!
*stands there smugly, forgets to dodge, deservedly takes tomato right in the face*
…it’s a bit of a disappointment that they still did the diagonal thing with the posters
Looks more like Hugo Clubfoot, the way he’s leaning.
That ain’t Brian Grazer, it’s Mickey Rourke’s hairstylist. Look at the hairline for fuck’s sake.
EX2: They took out their bucket lists with guns.
Why doesn’t the Young Adult poster just say “From The Writer and Director of Juno”? Juno was a much bigger hit than Up In The Air.
Also, I really liked UITA while I was watching it but realized a half hour after it ended that it made no sense. Why would companies–struggling ones that need to lay people off–pay a lot of money to have Dapper McKnickermoisten fly in to do the firing?
/Debunking old movies whether you like it or not
I realize that correlation and causation are different and this purely anecdotal evidence but I’m sure we can agree that movies like A Thousand Words cause cancer.
The profusion of gloves on the EX2 poster makes it look like a Rob Liefeld drawing.
“Hey, y’all Orientals like cats with big eyes, right?”
Just cats in general. Such a versatile meat, and so cheap!
Do you think they all fought over who got to hold which gun? I like to think that Carl Weathers was supposed to be in this flick, but he and Dolph got into an “argument” over who got to hold the ‘nade launcher.
“If he dies, he dies” *stairs longingly into Stallone’s eyes*
I want to see Charlize Onther…
*points to crotch*
Is Special K supposed to actually be playing this guy from “A Trip to the Moon”?
[www.imdb.com]
Eh, eh? Totally explains the nuked moon.
Well Junker23 since Special K’s character is named Georges Méliès, I damn say you might have cracked this case wide open. Congratulatory handjobs are in the back. Ask for Hector.
This looks like the 80′s exploded.
Georges Méliès totally ripped off the Smashing Pumpkins. Hack.
When Frotcast’s Bret isn’t drawing squirrels, he is photoshopping Shanahan-esque leathery skin out of Stallone posters. By the looks of it, Bret hasn’t had much sleep recently.
As a (extremely single) freshman in college, a bunch of other girlfriend-less dudes and I decided to spend a Friday, which happened to be Valentines Day, with a movie night. The idiot who picked the movie selected Ed Burns’ “She’s The One,” featuring a still-hot Jennifer Aniston and Cameron Diaz. The movie sucks, but was just good enough to keep watching when you have nothing else to do, and your primary focus is drinking. By the end of the movie, as all the relationships with the pretty girls turn to shit, we all wanted to kill ourselves. Although I grant you that Ed Burns is a good actor, I never forgave him for that.
Umm, something funny, something funny…. Fuck Ed Burns and his mullet and his checkered hat!! Alright, I got nothin’.
I still wish he got killed in Saving Private Ryan instead of … pretty much everyone else. Except Vin Diesel. Fuck that guy.
Expendables 2: The Sound of Ten Erections Slapping Each Other
(hint: it’s sort of like thwok thwok thwok)
You know that’s special effects, with Fassbender’s wiener, right? There’s no way they could fit that shit on screen.
If you flip between the Puss in Boots poster and the Project X poster real fast, you start to get the feeling that cat raped that dude.
Bender and Junker23, you just done went and fucked up the movie for everyone. Way to overanalyze a poster.
I kid! But seriously, people would be better off not necessarily knowing that prior to seeing Hugo.
Hopefully you won’t further analyze the posters and tell us who dies at the end.
That dobie is actually even more awesome in the movie. 3D dobie! Plus two weiner dogs. Awesome.
Expendable boner rises
Chris Pine’s forehead looks to have stumbled into This Means War from Green Lantern world. Still a fine looking poster though.
I’m pretty sure he refers to his dick as “The Assbender.”
It must’ve taken everything in your power not to photoshop the mace cop onto the “Project X” poster. You’re a stronger man than I
Is there a reason Stallone’s handlebar mustache has gone unnoticed?
I did some rework on that poster, now it’s more accurate:
[fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net]
mattyj, I would say the ones who ruined it are the designers who put the fucking nuked moon on the back if Special K poster, amirite? Granted, as the poster was for American audiences they thought it would go *swoosh* over people’s heads…
Hello Larry, as someone who used to be flown in to fire people I can assure you it makes perfect sense. Then again, that sense is corporate sense which often makes little sense to those of us with the good sense not to think about how it doesn’t really make sense!
You knocked it out of the fucking ballpark with no 21! Bravo Sir! (twirls moustache and fondles nutsack in appreciation)
Okay I know I’m a dumb girl who doesn’t know anything about guns, but in slide 3, the first Ghost Rider “poster,” are those . . . shell casings attached to those bullets, still? Or are those just bullets with whose shape I am unfamiliar?
Or maybe it’s okay because the bullets are flying via the power of skull, and have not been fired from a gun. I don’t know.
All those Hugo posters look like the photographer said, “Could you duck down a bit? Our movie posters aren’t that tall. Little more. Little more. Perfect.”
i made an account just for this post, because otherwise your website sux. lol just KIDDING. i’ve heard that this is a fake. sly is wearing his demolition man hat. i’m not sure what movie arnold was in from that photo but it was something. etc etc et etcetera
Jude Law might be British, but his hairline is a Ghana.
Wokka wokka
when chuck norris name pops up on the open credits the movie will end and the ending credits will begin