I would have sworn that was Chevy Chase as the voice of the dog until I started reading your analysis. That would have made this a million times better if it had been.
And Billy Bob from Varsity Blues is Voight’s son and henchman! Classic! I love that he sees what’s going on and just does the whole, “Fuck it. I’m going home” move.
So wait… in the movie about a talking dog who can also do karate & breakdance with Academy Award Winner Jon Voight, we’re just supposed to believe that a garbage truck can somehow drive up onto a rooftop once a week and empty a dumpster? I suspended my disbelief when you said the guy from Varsity Blues had the same father as Angelina Jolie, but a magical dumptruck? C’mon, Karate Dog!
Erm…HELLO…that dog is quite obviously doing kung fu and NOT karate. In fact, the flamboyant style and lack of rigidity suggests the showmanship of modern Wushu. God, if you’re going to ask me to believe…
I am appalled that DG didn’t make a joke about how Voight literally throws a kitchen sink at Karate Dog. Yes, we got the metaphor. Thanks. You didn’t need to literalize it. Who wrote this? Geoff Johns?
Brett Ratner has the remake rights to this. So we can expect “Karate Dogg” soon, with Eddie Murphy not only voicing the hound but playing every other role too.
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Holy shit. This also now my favorite non-Alison Brie thing ever. That is just stupidly amazing.
I would have sworn that was Chevy Chase as the voice of the dog until I started reading your analysis. That would have made this a million times better if it had been.
And Billy Bob from Varsity Blues is Voight’s son and henchman! Classic! I love that he sees what’s going on and just does the whole, “Fuck it. I’m going home” move.
I own this DVD, I would’ve been happy to have been in this think-tank.
“Hike the leg, Mr. Cho.”
“Yes, Sensei!”
As an homage to the original, “Ninja Stars to 270 degree dumpster watermelon” is the opening trick in Karate Dog xXx: The Return of Ken L. Cage.
So wait… in the movie about a talking dog who can also do karate & breakdance with Academy Award Winner Jon Voight, we’re just supposed to believe that a garbage truck can somehow drive up onto a rooftop once a week and empty a dumpster? I suspended my disbelief when you said the guy from Varsity Blues had the same father as Angelina Jolie, but a magical dumptruck? C’mon, Karate Dog!
Everything else? Totally legit
This is not the only movie with a CGI animal which Jon Voight regrets.
See, NBC, this is why you can’t cancel “Community.” You can’t let Chevy Chase go back to this.
Erm…HELLO…that dog is quite obviously doing kung fu and NOT karate. In fact, the flamboyant style and lack of rigidity suggests the showmanship of modern Wushu. God, if you’re going to ask me to believe…
Then Jon Voight was all like “Come at me, Cho.”
Oh, it IS Chase. That’ll teach me to finish reading the article before I start typing like a drunk chimp.
Actually, if Chevy Chase is going to voice a dog, it should probably be a cranky, racist old bulldog out to hump younger dogs.
And, really, shouldn’t his name be Sparky?
“My point is this: I would watch a Karate Dog origin story so hard my DVD player would vaporize when I was done.”
Karate Dog Begins. The Canine Ninja. The Canine Ninja Rises.
Call Chris Nolan immediately!
This is the sequel to “Ghost Dog,” right?
@Patty Boots Specifically, this bulldog. http://carlidavidson.photoshelter.com/gallery-image/Shake/G0000s_trsF9CDFI/I0000slirnw98434
I am appalled that DG didn’t make a joke about how Voight literally throws a kitchen sink at Karate Dog. Yes, we got the metaphor. Thanks. You didn’t need to literalize it. Who wrote this? Geoff Johns?
Brett Ratner has the remake rights to this. So we can expect “Karate Dogg” soon, with Eddie Murphy not only voicing the hound but playing every other role too.
That would still be better than X3.
Hong Kong Phooey is not impressed.
Kick, Ubu, kick. Good dog.
Woof!
Was anyone else disturbed during the dog party, when the Rotweiler in the hot tub was playfully accused of humping puppies?
i don’t think the dog party was that off the hook. I didn’t see a single corgi there.
Also, Cho Cho could be a joke because chocho in Spanish means “pussy”. The writers of this film are clever.
Actually, Cho Cho lands a roundhouse TAIL to the face to finish off Voight. Just paws it and you can tell.
Damn, Patton Oswalt looks terrible.
*Stunt Horse: The Horse That Does Stunts!*
Sorry, but this movie came out in 1991 and was called “Wild Hearts Can’t Be Broken.”
*goes back to watching dog scoot butt across carpet*
I think a few of those screencaps are from Vivid’s “This Ain’t Karate Dog”.