Eddie Murphy decides hosting the Oscars is for… uh… he quits

Yesterday afternoon, Brett Ratner stepped down as Oscars host in the wake of all the terrible things he said about rehearsal, Asians, Lindsay Lohan, and shrimp (but mostly because he used the F-A-G word). There was much speculation about whether Eddie Murphy, who’d been hand-fondled by Ratner to host the telecast (and who used that same word quite a few times in an even worse context in his most famous comedy special), would stay on as emcee. The short answer: no, he won’t.

Commented Murphy, “First and foremost I want to say that I completely understand and support each party’s decision with regard to a change of producers for this year’s Academy Awards ceremony. I was truly looking forward to being a part of the show that our production team and writers were just starting to develop, but I’m sure that the new production team and host will do an equally great job.” [HollywoodReporter]

Yes, how could one of the world’s most famous comedians ever hope to host an awards show without the guidance of the guy who made Money Talks? It would be LITERALLY IMPOSSIBLE. Why, he might forget to be sassy! Meanwhile, I think the best Oscars suggestion I’ve heard came from Steven Rosenthal on Twitter:

Please tell me Marc Shaiman is writing an opening Oscar number entitled “Rehearsal is for Fags.”

Brilliant.

Addition: Thanks to WWTDD for saving me the trouble of finding this clip:

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