Comments of the Week
11.20.11People are always telling me, “Vince, I love your site, but half the reason I read it is for the comments.” That always hurts my feelings a bit, but I understand. My commenters are funny, which is why every week I try to recognize their brilliance. Hopefully you all know how comments of the week works by now. Nominate your favorite comments in the Comments of the Week post, and I choose the winner at the beginning of the week.
This week’s winner was an easy choice. Token Black Guy took my racist joke about black dudes crossing the street slowly on purpose and knocked it out of the park.
TokenBlackGuy says: WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT THAT? *dials frantically* “LeDarrius. They’re on to us. Kill operation HonkeyDelay.”
See? That’s the spirit of interracial cooperation for the purpose of comedy that made Tower Heist great. A very close second goes to Good Grief in the Michael Bay Demands Big Macs post:
Good Grief says: Hearing of Bay and Big Macs, Olivia Munn begins drafting a “riveting” third chapter to her new book.
DeanExMachina on the Mission Impossible poster:
DeanExMachina says: “No backup…No contact…No plan…No choice…No gays.”
Larry finally justified the existence of Hawkeye in the Avengers Banner post:
Larry says: As long as someone refers to Hawkeye as “silent but deadly” he can be in the movie.
Inspired by Frank Miller’s hatred of Occupy Wall Street, BigDawg expresses a view I’ve long held, but never articulated:
BigDawg: When will people learn? When will the ceaseless ignorance stop? It’s one fedora per crew.
I think Robert Rodriguez’s is technically a cowboy hat, but the point still stands. Same goes for neon Ray Bans.
Elsewhere, GenePoolParty’s pun in the Iron Lady post made me groan pretty hard, which is generally the best measure of a pun.
GenePoolParty: This puts the “Fe” in Female World Leaders.
Moving on, I don’t know what’s weirder, this Ghanian movie about an Alien that kicks a baby, or Michelle07′s comment about it:
Michelle07 says: It inspired me to finally get to work on my screenplay District 9 1/2 Weeks. The tale of two tin twinks trying to takeover toddler town. Needless to say, it’s an erotic journey.
Needless to say indeed.
Shop 101 explained my predicament in the Stevie Nicks Fajita Round-Up post:
Shop 101 says: Telling people that either Lucy Lawless or SNL was ever funny must have been a bitch. Finding that clip is akin to finding footage of Bigfoot riding a unicorn.
I actually didn’t even remember that it was Lucy Lawless in that sketch. Perhaps I’m Xenaphobic and didn’t even know it. And finally, Patty Boots makes the easy joke in the Matrix Goes Mambo No. 5 post:
Patty Boots: I hope Lou got paid for this. He could probably use a little bit of royalties in his life.
Sometimes the easy joke is the best one. Anyway, great job again this week, folks. There were probably twenty more worthy comments that I missed, but that’s why you nominate. NOMINATE.
[Picture via RobotinDisguise]



Thanks, TBG, for teaching me that I’ve been spelling “honky” wrong all these years.
/updates resume
The other half reason they read this site? To ignore C-Tates posts.
Why dont i ever get naaaminated?
I’m just a horrible postet. I don’t know what your excuse is.
This is me nominating Stinky’s post. I know that feel, bro…
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Stinky Pete
This is me typing, I am making a funny comment this video, then I will hit “enter” and reload the COTW page for the next three hours hoping someone nominates it.
Sometimes the easy joke is the best one.
to win you need to apparently do the bestestxxx (xtreme!)
Holy shit, I need a cigarette after this one. Give that man the $10,000!
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Ace Rimmer
Oh my God, I was wrong,
I had retard-strengh all along,
I guess you’ve finally made a Rocky
YES WE’VE FINALLY MADE A ROCKY
Yes, you’ve finally made a Rocky out of meeeeee.
… I love you Carl Weathers.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Can’t nominate Stinky for summarizing my existence. Instead:
Good Grief
His commentary for “The 6th Day” must be agonizing: “This is the me who isn’t the real me talking to the real me about how many me’s have been made without the me who isn’t the me who isn’t me knowing about it. And there’s Michael Rapaport.”
Jessolido (mostly for “moofies”)
The original idea was to have this as a descriptive video track for the visually impaired (or to use Arnold’s original, less PC terminology “Ahnold tells moofies to da blind kids”), but that idea had to be scrapped due to Arnold’s constant use of the phrase “Now look at dis heah.”
jabask
“In dis scene I am confused as to how, given the amount of gin joints in the world, a woman with which I have had a complicated relationship with has decided to patronise mine. The probability of this happening is not likely.”
The entire thread is a golden car submerged in a pool of awesome.
So good.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
BigDawg
“Lacrosse mean’s never having to say your sorry”
Who’s a fratty dog? Who’s a fratty dog? That’s right, you are!
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
GlennBeckHasAIDS
From Kellen Lutz Sulks at Lacrosse:
Ace Rimmer said:
Kellan Lutz is the pox blanket of a new generation.
Short and sweet, which is hard to execute (which is how I’ve often been described).
I have to second Ace, given that I thought his small pox joke was good enough to steal.
Pretty inside baseball, but brilliant nonetheless.
filmdrunk.uproxx.com/2011/11/drunk-twi-hard-tries-to-drive-to-breaking-dawn-on-three-tires
Garipeto
BF: Sure, honey, we’ll go see Twilight when I get back from lacrosse practice. I need to win the right-side attack spot…
Olivia Ornelas: OMG YESSSS ILUVU LLOLOL!!!!
BF: Well, I hate to be like, an Indian giver and all… but I actually have to do some shirtless barn construction stuff tonight, so…
Olivia Ornelas: “YARGLEBARGAHH!!!!!!!!1″
I’m agreeing with Vince. That one was pretty impressive.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
pigpeen Chappas my quiddick about the JFK assassination *:(
Have you seen that Jackie O? I would’ve assassinated her grassy knoll, ifyouknowwhatimeanandimnotsureievendo.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Good Grief
When asked who would be perfect to play the lead role in a Kimbo Slice biopic, Sharon Bialy answered, “Edward Furlong.”
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Truly groan-worthy, Petey Stink:
Of course they never end up together; for Anton it’s not about getting the girl, it’s the thrill of the chaise.
[filmdrunk.uproxx.com]
Sous Chef:
Hater Court sounds like the Apollo of Judge Shows.